A Different Perspective

by: Holly Hill 
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Rating: G Add Review   Read Reviews, Last Review 04/22/07 (3) Added: 04/22/2007
Complete: yes 
Synopsis:Rachael's new job offers new opportunities, more challenges, and an unintended consequence. A continuation of the story "Summer Project"
Categories: Crossdressing / TV  Workplace Situations 
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A Different Perspective
by Holly Hill

Eric Jeffreys and his wife Dianne were awakened by the sound of the neighbor's lawn mower. They had slept far too soundly. By the amount of light that was streaming into the room, the hour was very late, even by L.A. standards.

"My, you must have been tired," Dianne said, giving Eric a playful pinch.

"I was. Your sister has been working me to death."

"Chris is probably up by now. She hadn't mentioned the fact that you have been working so hard. In fact, she told me that your time at the shop has been pretty leisurely."

Eric hated to agree but his time working in Denver has been wonderful. Since his layoff from the factory and his subsequent agreement to help in Chris' shop, his life had been radically changed- for the superb.

He slipped out of bed and looked in the dresser mirror. His male body was at odds with his brightly-colored nails, arched eyebrows and permed hair. He crossed to his dresser and opened his underwear drawer. A few panties, two bras and a camisole were all that he found.

"All of Eric's clothes are in boxes in the basement," Dianne reminded him.

"Would it be OK if I dressed as Rachael today?"

"With the hair and nails, I think that would look best."

Rachael was Eric's other self, the one that had been staying with Chris in Denver. For as long as Eric could remember he had cross-dressed. First in his mother's and older sister's clothes, then later in his wife's, all without anyone's knowledge. Finally after many years of marriage Eric got up the nerve to announce his feminine side. Dianne was tolerant but troubled by the revelation, and more than a little upset about all of the lies and deceit. It has been an awkward four years since he had revealed Rachael to his wife, but they had been able to reach a comfortable arrangement.

"Dianne, you take the bathroom first. It always takes me a little longer."

"OK, and I want to thank Eric for last night!" she said in a conspiratorial whisper.

"That was my pleasure," he replied with a broad grin.

It had been many weeks since Eric and Dianne had been together and there was some pent-up passion that they quenched thoroughly during a tender session of lovemaking. Eric had sought to provide for Dianne's every need- apparently he had succeeded.

After Dianne closed the door to the bathroom, Eric again inspected himself in the mirror. His fingernails were coated with acrylic, filed to feminine shape and coated in shiny garnet polish. There was a matching color on his toenails. His dark-blond hair was a mass of curls, colored and permed by Dianne's hairstylist. His eyebrows were plucked to a high arch and his feminine appearance pleased him. The middle of his body betrayed his male self, but he knew just how to rectify that issue and remove the unsightly bulge- a little tape would do the magic. Eric pulled out a matching bra, panty and camisole from his underwear drawer and then arranged his makeup in front of the large mirror. Dianne, Chris and Rachael had all gone down to the mall for makeovers during one magic week several months ago and a professional showed him how to achieve a feminine appearance. To be sure, he did not pass effortlessly. He was still too tall, had too many muscles in the wrong places, had a thick waist and not enough hips. With close scrutiny he could never pass as a woman, but he found that most will allow him to be the gender that he presented himself to be. As he continued to arrange his things, Dianne emerged from the bathroom. Eric gave her smile.

"You look really nice, Dianne. I love what you are doing with your makeup."

"It is all because of that bitch Rachael!" Dianne announced with a giggle. "She always looks like something out of a fashion magazine- it makes me have to work that much harder."

"Honey, if Rachael had half of what you do, she would be in heaven. I like the slacks, are they new?" Rachael asked, regarding her outfit. Dianne's cinnamon-colored slacks complemented her ivory twin-set beautifully.

"These old things," Dianne said with a wink, "I'm going to go down and look after Chris. Will Rachael be down in a little bit?"

"Yes, but it is going to take considerably longer than it took you."

Dianne left the room as Eric took over the bathroom to start the transformation into Rachael.

++++++++++++++

"Good morning," Chris called from the kitchen table as Dianne entered. Chris was wearing a beautiful robe over a matching nightgown, all in a fetching shade of turquoise. "Hi there. How did you sleep?"

"Very well, how about yourself?" Chris asked with a knowing smile.

"It took a little while for me to fall asleep."

"It sounded like you were having a good time. I could hear you from my room, and I wouldn't be surprised if the whole neighborhood could hear you."

"Yes, it had been a long time." Dianne said, face reddening.

"Is Rachael going to be joining us for breakfast?" Chris said, with an edge of hesitation.

"Yes, she'll be down in a bit- probably closer to an hour." Dianne said with a grin.

"She has been getting faster with her morning routine, of course she's had some practice." Chris smiled inwardly, thinking back to the first couple of mornings in Denver. After morning exercises, Rachael would take an hour to get ready. With a daily routine of makeup and wardrobe, she was getting much quicker.

"Rachael has that job interview in Denver next Thursday. Are you going to be OK with that?" Chris asked.

"I think so. I'm pretty sure that I will be relocating from the L.A. office to Denver anyway, so that will work out."

"So you think the promotion will go through? That'll be wonderful!"

"Yes, it's going to happen. My boss authorized me to start looking for a place in Denver- they are even going to be taking care of the relocation."

"That sounds pretty good. Have you thought about where you might move?"

"I'm thinking maybe a duplex or maybe we might try to find a house. Somewhere Rachael and I might have a bit more privacy and freedom."

"Well, it sounds like your job is taken care of. Do you think the position that Rachael is looking at will work out for you guys?"

"You should know that Rachael is perfectly comfortable working in your shop and knows all about breast forms and such. It sounds like an option," Dianne said.

"He has certainly been a help for me since April has been gone."

"How is April and the new member of the family?"

"Mother and Father are very proud of their new little daughter."

"Is April planning to come back to work at the store?" Dianne asked.

"She is due back in about three weeks."

"Chris..." Dianne hesitated, and then continued, "Do you know much about the company that Rachael is going to see?"

"Yes, they are one of the biggest manufacturers of mastectomy products this side of the Mississippi."

"And they are planning to do something for the transgender community?"

"From what I gather, what they want to do is to develop a support program for cross-dressers and to work with their distributors to understand their special needs."

"Chris, what's the big deal. I mean why do they need to hire someone to do this for them."

"There is really a lot of mis-information and downright hostility with people who cross-dress. I think they want to make it easier for people to access the services that they need."

"These are just tits, Chris, what's the big deal?"

"Dianne, please! For someone who works with mastectomy patients on a daily basis, I can assure you it is not 'just tits.' Women who have had a mastectomy are very concerned with their body image. I can only imagine what it is like for a cross-dresser who was never born with 'tits' at all?"

"They just get in the way, get sore, and cause creases in your shoulders from the bra straps."

"Maybe you should try to explain that to one of my patients after she looses one of her breasts to cancer. Better yet, ask Rachael what her reaction was the first time that she wore a silicone form."

"And so, what the company wants to do is to create another market for their products," Dianne continued.

"I guess that would be the cynical explanation."

"I'm just trying to make sure that Eric, or maybe I should say Rachael, isn't just being hustled."

"I have worked with these people for a long time. I really think they are on the level, Dianne, or I wouldn't suggest that Rachael get involved with them."

"I'm sorry, Chris. I should have thought a little bit more before I said that."

"I can understand your hesitation, Dianne. Unlike working at my shop, Rachael will definitely be going into Indian country and neither of us will be there to watch out for her."

"Do you think the company will expect her to dress all the time as Rachael?" Dianne asked.

"They didn't really express a preference. I suppose that it could be either Eric or Rachael, or maybe some type of androgynous presentation."

"I'm pretty sure it won't be that last one," Dianne explained, "I have talked Eric about that and he wants his clothing to be either all male or all female."

"I never knew that!"

"He doesn't under-dress or get any kick out of something like wearing women's jeans with a male shirt. If he dresses he goes all the way feminine- hair, nails, makeup, everything."

"That's interesting. How does he explain that?" Chris asked, her curiosity piqued.

"When we went to the counselor she was pretty worried about it," Dianne explained, "but Eric was adamant- in his mind anything less than being all Eric or all Rachael would just be a fetish."

"Wow..." Chris chuckled, "What did the doctor have to say about that?"

"Not much, the doctor just wanted to make sure that Eric did not suffer from any mental illness. We all agreed- he may be weird, but at least he isn't crazy," Dianne said, causing them both to start laughing.

++++++++++++++

Rachael entered the room to the sounds of laughter.

"Well, you two seem to be enjoying yourselves."

"Actually, yes, we are. It's been quite exciting this past couple of months and it is great to be able to catch up," Chris explained.

"You look really nice," Dianne announced, "I like the outfit. Did you get that in Denver?"

"Yes, Chris and I do a lot of shopping," Rachael said, eliciting a grown from Chris. "I got the blouse at the mall and the skirt we found at one of the consignment shops."

"We were talking about your job possibility. Are you still planning to go for the interview?" Dianne asked.

"I think I would like to at least talk to them about it," Rachael replied.

"Chris was saying it is a pretty big place."

"Yes, and everyone that I have spoken with there have been really nice." Rachael said. "When I'm working at Chris' shop, I usually end up calling over there a couple of times a week to place orders or check the status of something. They are a pretty impressive organization."

"What is the name of the company?" Dianne asked.

"The division in Denver that make the breast forms is called Normacare. They are part of a larger health care company called Finestone Pharmaceuticals."

"I think I have heard of Finestone. They ARE big."

"I get a chance to go over to the Denver office a couple of times a year for workshops, it is a beautiful facility," Chris added.

"What do you think about the program that they are setting up?" Dianne asked.

"I would like to get some more details, but the idea of being able to assist other cross-dressers in selecting the proper forms and foundation garments is exciting. I still have a lot of questions for them."

"They are also thinking about having you travel to conventions and events. Is that going to be a hassle?" Dianne asked.

"I don't think so. What little bit of traveling that I have done as Rachael has been pretty routine. Some scrutiny of my ID card and boarding pass and they just send me through as normal."

"Well, we had probably better get some breakfast going or we are just going to sit here at the kitchen table all day and starve to death." Dianne joked, raising from her chair and heading toward the refrigerator.

"I'll help," Rachael offered, getting up as well.

"You set the table and I will get some eggs in the skillet."

"And I'd better get dressed," Chris said, hurrying back to the guest room.

++++++++++++++

After breakfast the three ladies sat at the table drinking coffee and visiting.

"Rachael, have you thought about what you might wear to your interview?" Chris asked.

"I have been struggling with that. I'm not sure whether I should go dressed as Eric or Rachael."

"If you would like my opinion, I think that you should go dressed as Rachael," Dianne offered.

"I think Dianne is right," Chris said.

"That was my preference also, but I just wanted to make sure I wasn't just projecting my desire to dress into the situation."

"Your ability to present a feminine image will be an important hiring criteria. I really think they are going to want to interview Rachael," Dianne said as Chris nodded her agreement.

"Now the only thing left to decide is what I have to wear for the interview."

"I really think we need to get you something a little less frilly than you usually wear. Something in a dark suit, navy I would think," Dianne suggested as Rachael wrinkled her nose.

"Yes, but maybe a patterned blouse or something with a bit of lace to express some femininity," Chris said.

"That sounds better, businesslike with a bit of style. Navy mid-heel pumps and a matching bag, dark hose and gold jewelry." Rachael said, eyes glazing over.

"You are getting into this, aren't you," Dianne smiled.

"It just means another shopping trip. This one is becoming a real clothes-horse," Chris noted.

"One other thing- you are going to need a resume," Dianne added.

"You're right. I've never had to do one. I sure didn't need one when I interviewed at the factory."

"Chris and I will help you get something worked up this evening. Right now we should probably think about getting out to the mall before it gets busy."

++++++++++++++

Sadly, the ladies didn't make it to the mall before the crowd. They were able to locate a great looking navy suit, a beautiful ivory blouse with a sea-shell pattern and the matching shoes and accessories. Besides the shopping, they had a nice lunch at the food court and took in a movie.

After a full day, the ladies settled in for the evening.

"We should probably get a resume put together for you, Rachael." Chris reminded.

"And what do we need to do about the layoff recall notice?" Dianne inquired.

"I'll call the Union next week and let them know that I we plan to relocate and that it is unlikely that I will be returning to work. I'll also let the Department of Labor know that I have an out-of-town interview and hopefully I'll be able to keep drawing unemployment until everything is settled."

"Rachael, do you plan on flying back with me to Denver on Monday?" Chris asked.

"I think so. I'll be able to fill in at the office. I'll need to be back there on Thursday for the interview anyway. Is that going to be OK, Dianne?"

"Sure," Dianne replied in a resigned tone.

"When are you coming up to Denver to look for a place?" Chris asked.

"I'm planning to fly up around the first of the month. That's only a couple of weeks away."

"Will you be able to stay for a while?" Rachael asked.

"I think I will be able to stay the weekend and probably a couple of days extra. I will need to do some checking on utilities, getting set up with a bank and stuff."

"Are you going to want to stay with me?" Chris asked.

"The company has offered to put me up in a hotel. Is that going to work out OK?"

"It will probably be more comfortable than someone sleeping on the couch at my place."

"I'll have the company make the arrangements next week."

++++++++++++++

The rest of the weekend went quickly and Rachael and Chris headed for LAX Sunday afternoon. The travel was uneventful and they ended up at the Denver airport right on time. A quick bus trip to the Park-and-Ride lot got them back to Chris' apartment just after dark.

Usually on Sunday evening Chris would have Eric make his appearance in order to call the unemployment office and to give him a bit of time for stress relief.

"Rachael, is Eric going to come over this evening?" Chris asked, using their code-phrase.

"No, Eric called the unemployment office before we came back to Denver, and Dianne took care of the other issue Friday night so I think I'll be able to remain as Rachael tonight."

"OK, well I'm tired and would like to head off to bed. Do you want the bathroom first?"

"No, Chris, you go ahead. I'll call Dianne and let her know we got in OK."

"Great, see you in a bit."

Chris exited toward the bathroom and left Rachael to her thoughts. Chris and Rachael had an agreement- as long as it was Rachael, Chris would allow her could sleep in the same bed. Eric, however, had to sleep on the couch and Chris would sleep in the queen bed alone. Since the couch was not all that comfortable, Rachael was not disappointed that she would be able to sleep in Chris' bed tonight.

Rachael spoke briefly with Dianne and right after hanging up, Chris came out of the bathroom in her nightgown.

"Chris, when I was in LA I put on my tape, but I never got you to do your artwork."

"Sure, honey, let me get the marker."

As part of her process of transformation, Rachael would tuck and tape to give herself a feminine shape. They had a game where Chris would draw a 'pussy' on Rachael's tape, then declare her an official girl. It was just a silly thing, but it was very important for Rachael to hear Chris pronounce her female status.

"I'm ready," Chris announced, coming into the room with the marker. Chris drew two lines about a quarter inch apart about where a woman's mons would be, then continued the lines between Rachael's legs. She then drew a semi-circle on the top and drew another line between the others.

"There you are, honey. You're official."

As Chris stood, Rachael hugged her tightly and told her she was the best.

"You better get ready for bed, exercise class starts early tomorrow."

++++++++++++++ The sound of the alarm awakened them early the next morning.

"Ready to exercise?" Rachael asked brightly.

"Right after you," Chris said, sleepily.

The pair got up and put on their workout gear and headed for the living room. They started the DVD and got through the warm-up.

"We must be getting better at this," Rachael said between breaths, "I am starting to be able to keep up."

"Remember when we couldn't even get through the warm-up without keeling over. We must be getting into shape."

After the exercise session, Rachael took the bathroom while Chris arranged things for breakfast and did some morning chores. Tomorrow Chris would get the bathroom first, but that usually didn't take quite as long.

After a healthy breakfast, Chris headed for the bathroom and Rachael cleaned up the breakfast dishes. After Chris was ready, they made the short drive to the shop and arrived just before eight AM. Chris went to check messages in her office and Rachael went to the 'cave,' which is what April called their office. It was more of a work-room with a collection of file cabinets, record boxes and tables. April and Rachael's small desk had a stack of file folders neatly ordered for the patients that Chris was scheduled to see this week. Right after 8 AM the telephone rang.

"Complete Women's Health, this is Rachael," she answered in her practiced feminine voice.

"Hello Rachael, my name is Anna and I have recently had breast surgery. I would like to see someone about breast forms."

"OK Anna, Chris is our consultant and we would be happy to set up an appointment for you. Just let me get a little information."

After they talked for a bit, Rachael was able to get an appointment set up for later that week.

That was pretty much the routine since Rachael had come to work at the shop.

A knock at the back door meant a delivery was on the way in.

Rachael opened the back door and looked out.

"Good morning, Gary," Rachael said to the driver as he brought a large box into the rear door and through to the store room.

"That's everything for this trip, Rachael," the driver said, handing over the digital clipboard for a signature.

"Thanks, Gary. We'll see you tomorrow." The box was from Normacare. Rachael carefully opened the box and compared the packing list with the order. One of the breast forms on the order was marked as not shipped. This wasn't unusual, but Rachael knew that the customer was planning to come in later that week. She made a note to call and get an expected shipment date so she could reschedule the appointment.

After storing the rest of the items in the stockroom, Rachael went back to the office to make some calls.

Her last call was to Normacare.

"Normacare, this is Amber, how can I help you?"

"Hi Amber, this is Rachael from Complete Women's Health."

"Oh, Hi Rachael. How was your weekend?"

"Chris and I went to L.A. so we were both tired by the time we got home last evening. How about you?"

"Pretty much the same. Just stayed home and did housework."

They visited briefly and then Rachael continued, "Amber, I'm calling about an order we received this morning, there was a NormaLite type 5 style 132 size 6 that we ordered that was marked as not shipped. I wanted to get a back-order date on that so I can re-schedule the customer."

"NovaLite type 5, that's a tear-drop?" Amber asked.

"Yes, do you need the patients name?"

"No, it's just that they had some problems with the tear-drop forms last week and we are a little behind in getting them out. Let me see what they are saying about an expected ship date."

"Great," Rachael replied, hearing Amber typing into her computer.

"Good news, Rachael. It looks like that one will be going out this afternoon. You should have it tomorrow."

"That will work out, the customer is due in on Thursday."

"You'll have it in plenty of time for the appointment."

"Is there anything else today, Rachael?"

"No, that's everything."

"I hear that you might be out here this week."

"Wow, how did you know about that?"

"Denise, the lady that is going to be interviewing you. She stopped me in the hall and asked if I had ever talked to you. Of course I told her you were super."

"Thanks so much, Amber. I'm sorry that you got put on the spot like that."

"There was no problem. You're going to love it here, Rachael."

"Thanks, Amber, I'm looking forward to finding out more about the position. Would it be OK if I popped in to meet you while I am there?"

"That would be fantastic! I'll ask Denise to bring you by and you can meet all of us!"

"I can't wait, we'll see you on Thursday."

"Thanks for calling Normacare, Rachael." After hanging up the phone, panic set in. "What was I thinking?" Rachael said to herself. She wondered why she had suggested that she stop by and visit Amber. Amber and her and talked many times on the phone, but certainly in person she would be able to tell that that Rachael was not a woman. She also wondered what Denise had told Amber about the position they were talking to Rachael about. Rachael was pounding her head on the desk when Chris walked in.

"What's the problem, Rachael?" Chris asked with concern, "You look troubled."

Rachael related the conversation with Amber but Chris didn't look the least bit upset.

"Really, Rachael, I don't think there will be any problem."

"I don't want to make Amber and all of the other sales agents out there feel betrayed."

"Why should they?" Chris asked in astonishment.

"Because I lied to them!"

"When did you do that?"

"Well, I call out there and tell them my name is Rachael, I use a feminine voice and do everything that I can to make them think I am a woman."

"I need to tell you something, but I don't quite know how to put it."

"Something worse than this?" Rachael gasped.

"They know..," Chris said.

"How?"

"I'm not sure, but when I was out there for the conference one of the agents asked me about it."

"I'm dead!"

"No, you're not. They know, so you aren't lying to anyone. Even with all of the agents knowing that Rachael has a penis, they are still willing to treat you like a trusted friend. Doesn't that tell you something?"

"All of them know, even Amber?"

Chris hesitated, "Amber was the one who asked me."

"I just can't believe they are going to accept me."

"Why shouldn't they accept you?"

"Because I'm a fake."

"Rachael, stop it. You are not. Why should the rest of the world accept you for who you are if you aren't willing to accept yourself?"

Rachael remained silent.

"Please Rachael, just go to the interview, meet Amber and the rest of the people and see for yourself. Have confidence in yourself and the rest of them will follow your lead."

"OK," Rachael said with a sniff.

"Here, have a tissue- and please, take the notion that you are a fraud or some counterfeit out of your mind. Remember, you are a man that has chosen to be a woman. There is something special about that!"

"But I'm not really a woman, Chris"

"You are just fixated on plumbing. Being a woman is what is in your heart, not what is in your underwear. Please don't build obstacles for yourself that aren't really there. There are enough real ones to worry about."

"I'm so confused."

"I wish I could help, Rachael, but all I can say is to follow your heart. You are a very special person, embrace that."

"You are such a wonderful friend, Chris."

"I need to get back, are you going to be OK?"

"Sure, I'll be fine... now."

++++++++++++++

The rest of the week was pretty routine for Rachael, but her level of anxiety rose steadily as the day of her interview approached. Chris noted her increased agitation with amusement.

"Everything is going to be fine, Rachael, I promise."

"I know in my heart you're right, but this is definitely going to be a different experience for me."

"Is there anything that you want to talk about?" Chris inquired.

"Well, I just keep hoping that I'm not going to mess something up."

"Like how?"

"Saying something stupid..."

Chris laughed uncontrollably, "You mean something like that?"

"Don't be mean, I'm serious."

"Rachael, honey, please be assured that you are the perfect choice for this position," Chris said, holding Rachael's hand, "They are looking for a very unique person and you are imminently suited for this job."

"It's just that I have never had a job that I would consider a professional position."

"Oh, what about your work for me at Complete Women's Health?"

"Ahh... Well... I..." Rachael stammered.

"When we went to the Renaissance meeting, you practically gave the presentation."

"Well, that was different."

"How so? When I came out of the meeting I remember coming out of the meeting and thinking that it was me that said something stupid. This is your element, Rachael. You understand being a cross-dresser, transgender, what ever you want to call it. No one can match your understanding unless they've lived it. You are an expert in the field, go with it!"

"It's just me, Chris, nothing more."

"Then, silly, just be you because that is what Normacare needs."

++++++++++++++

After a fitful night sleep and a drama-filled morning, Rachael arrived at the Normacare office just before ten. Before she left the shop, Rachael was so panicked that a couple of times Chris threatened to give her a Valium to calm her down. She pulled into the lot and parked in a visitor space. She then pulled down the visor and checked her hair and makeup for the hundredth time since she left the shop. As she walked toward the front door, she hesitated, thinking how she would announce herself. She finally resolved to use her name the same way it was on her drivers license.

Rachael approached the receptionist and gave a bright smile.

"Hi, I'm Eric Jeffreys, and I'm here for an interview with Denise Walker."

"Oh, Hi Rachael, we've been expecting you. Denise will be with you in just a bit but she wanted to have you get started on some paperwork. Here is an application and a couple of release forms for you to sign. You can have a seat over there and please let me know if you have any questions."

"OK, Thank you."

"Would you like a cup of coffee or some water or something?"

"Nothing right now. I'll get started on this paperwork."

"Oh, I'm Donna, by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Donna," Rachael said sweetly, giving her offered hand a brief shake. Donna was a redhead with a clear complexion and an upturned nose. She wore the briefest of makeup which complimented her butterfly-motif blouse. Her smile seemed to brighten up the whole room.

Rachael sat at the table indicated and started going through the stack of paperwork. The job application was pretty normal, name- address- job history, the usual.

There were a couple of forms that she examined with some hesitation. One was a release for a background check, the other was regarding the required physical examination and drug test. She remembered what Chris told her, 'you aren't trying to fool anyone, you are just who you are.' She signed all of the forms 'Eric Jeffreys' and passed the stack back to Donna.

"Donna, I have a resume that I would like to include with the application." Rachael announced, passing the two pages across the desk to Donna.

"Thank you. That will be perfect. Please have a seat and I'll give Denise a call."

Rachael took a seat and after a few minutes a pleasant looking woman wearing a gray pants-suit approached. Her low-heel pumps made a quiet sound on the carpeting as she moved toward where Rachael was sitting.

"Hi, Rachael, I'm Denise. Thank you for coming in today."

Rachael rose and responded sweetly, "It is my pleasure." Rachael like her immediately. Her green eyeshadow complemented deep brown eyes. Brunette curls fell to her shoulders and Rachael noticed highlights which spoke of some time in the beautician's chair. "If you'd like to follow me back to my office we can visit for a little bit. Would you like anything to drink?"

"No, I'm fine, thanks anyway," Rachael said, consciously trying to limit her fluid intake in order to delay the inevitable trip to the restroom.

Rachael accompanied Denise back to her very comfortable office. Rachael looked out a window which overlooked a beautiful courtyard. "I just love your facility. It is so beautiful."

"Thank you, Rachael. Aesthetics is an important part of what we do here. I guess the building is just an extension of that."

Rachael nodded in appreciation.

Denise appeared to hesitate and then continued, "Rachael, I have been in contact with our legal department and we are in a bit of quicksand here. I assure you that we want to fill this position with a person such as yourself but there are bound to be some challenges."

"I see," Rachael replied with a puzzled look on her face.

"What I mean, Rachael, is that our legal people tell me that the EEOC and state labor law can't give us any guidance on this unique position. We are sailing onto uncharted waters."

"What can I do to assure you that I don't have any expectations beyond that of regular employee." Rachael said.

"I want to be clear, Rachael. For this project to be successful, we need someone with some unique abilities, someone such as yourself. We are willing to provide reasonable accommodations, but we are going to need to ask something of you."

"Please, whatever I can do..."

"Firstly, I would like you to assure me that if during this interview that if I ask you something that makes you uncomfortable or that you would rather not talk about, please let me know."

"I will certainly agree to that."

"And should you accept a position here, the same request will apply. Our first goal here is to have satisfied customers, followed closely by the desire to have happy employees. If there is a situation where you are made to feel uncomfortable, I want you to let me know."

"Agreed."

"Let's take a look at your resume..." Denise continued on a brighter note.

They discussed the items on Rachel's resume and when Denise got to the entry about Complete Women's Health, she smiled.

"It's great that you have experience with our products. I want to let you know your store consistently gets high marks for customer satisfaction, so it is no small matter that you have been associated with them."

"That's very reassuring. Chris does a very good job."

"We think that you all do," Denise corrected.

"Thank you."

"Actually, it was one of the satisfaction surveys that we sent out that got us thinking about starting this project. I think that both you and Chris were involved with the customer."

"That's wonderful news," Rachael said, "It is always rewarding to know that your efforts are appreciated."

"They are, and that is exactly the customer experience that we would like to foster. We are aware that there are a some challenges for transgendered people to get what they need in a comfortable environment. We want to encourage our dealers to provide high quality products and service to this group and at the same time be sensitive to their needs. Most of our dealers are capable of doing that, they just need the information and contacts in order to make it effective. This is what we hope to provide through Normacare."

Rachael was quiet for a moment as she digested the information.

"Here is where some of my questions might get a little awkward. Please let me know if you don't want to answer. It is just that we feel we need to know some of these details to know what kind of accommodations that we would need to make for you in the workplace."

"OK, please continue."

"You are genetically male?"

"Yes," Rachael said with a smile.

"Do you take hormones?" Denise asked intently.

"No."

"How do you characterize yourself and your sexuality?"

"I'm a heterosexual."

"Do you have the desire to transition?"

"No."

"Are you still OK with me asking these questions?"

"I have no problem, Denise," Rachael replied, "This is just who I am."

"Have you seen a counselor or received any mental-health support with your cross-dressing?"

"Yes."

"Please don't discuss any diagnosis, but did you find the counseling useful?"

"I think so, yes."

"Do you belong to any transgender support or social groups?"

"Yes, I belong to a national organization, and also a local group in L.A. I have attended a group meeting here in Denver but I am not a member of that group."

"Would you be willing to represent our programs, products and services to these types of organizations?"

"I would, but the company is going to need to set up some strict guidelines regarding these organizations. Some of the members are closeted and there are security and privacy concerns associated with contacting them."

"Oh, I hadn't considered that."

"I was somewhat concerned that you had contacted one of the transgender customers of Complete Women's Health to complete a satisfaction survey. That could have been awkward."

"Thank you, I'll make our customer satisfaction people be aware of that. That is exactly the type of knowledge that we are hoping to gain from bringing someone such as yourself into the organization."

"I'm certainly willing to share what I know and to help you set up a successful program."

"Do you have any questions for me, Rachael?"

Rachael asked Denise several questions about the position and the company.

"I will probably will think of a million more questions once I leave the building." Rachael said. "We have talked some about the position, but can I find out more the about the hours, number of days per week, dress code, things like that."

"We will be pretty flexible regarding the hours. The requisition right now is for up to 24 hours per week. At that number of hours you will qualify for group health benefits, profit sharing and some of the other company benefits. If you are the successful candidate, the salary and a complete list of benefits will be in the offer letter."

"Sounds great!"

"We request business dress for salaried employees. Fridays are business casual, no cut-off jeans, sweatshirts, jogging suits, or anything like that. For meetings with clients and vendors, our employees are expected to dress appropriately."

"Is my gender presentation going to be an issue?"

"You have a somewhat unique circumstance, but I think you would be free to dress as either gender. We might need to make you two nameplates!" Denise said with a laugh.

Rachael and Denise continued to talk for a while, and when they were finished Denise smiled.

"Rachael, there are some people down in the telemarketing department that would like to meet you."

"Yes, I think I am ready to meet my Normacare friends in person."

++++++++++++++

Denise lead Rachael through the building and into the telemarketing department. They approached one of the cubicles and waited for the agent to finish up the call. The agent entered a few keystrokes onto the terminal, pushed a button on the telephone and turned to face them. Her face beamed.

"Amber, this is Rachael," Denise said.

Amber boiled out of her chair and gave Rachael a big hug.

"It is so good to meet you, Rachael," she announced, "Well, what do you think of Normacare?"

"I love it, I just hope everything works out."

One by one, the other agents approached. By the time they were finished, Rachael had met everyone in the department. She had spoken to most of the at one time or another, but there were a couple of the agents that were new to her.

"OK, I had better let everyone get back to work," Rachael said, "but it is sure great to meet everyone."

"Bye, Rachael," Amber said, returning to her seat and logging back into her terminal, "I hope to see you soon."

As they walked to the front of the building, Denise stopped in front of a large office.

"Rachael, I would like to have you meet our president."

"Sure," she replied, hesitantly.

Denise gave a knock on the open door and they entered a richly appointed office. An impeccability dressed slightly older man with salt and pepper gray hair looked up from his desk.

Denise addressed him, "Carter, this is... ah... Eric Jeffreys," Denise said, stumbling over the introduction.

As the man rose, Denise continued, "Eric goes by the name Rachael."

Denise turned toward Rachael, "Rachael, this is Carter Abrams, the president of the Normacare division."

"Rachael, it is so good to meet you," Carter said with a wide smile.

"It is an honor to meet you, sir," Rachael said, "I certainly appreciate the opportunity to visit your beautiful facility."

"I trust that Denise has made you feel comfortable and has been able to answer all of your questions."

"Yes, she has been great."

They visited briefly, then Carter said, "Well, if anything comes up or you have any questions for me, please give a call."

"I appreciate that very much, sir."

"Thanks for dropping by Denise, and it was great to meet you, Rachael."

"Likewise..."

After they exited the office, Rachael blew a long stream of air through pursed lips.

"I hope that didn't make you uncomfortable, Rachael," Denise said.

"No, it was just unexpected."

"Well, you did just fine. Just to let you know, you have made a very good impression on everyone today. More than that, all of your references have been excellent and I have a very good feeling about your future with Normacare."

"How long do you think it will be before a decision is made?" Rachael pressed.

"We should know next week." Denise said as they approached Donna at the reception desk.

"Thanks for everything today, I look forward to hearing from you," Rachael said and then turned to Donna.

"I hope to see you soon Donna."

"Good bye," Donna said, "Drive safe."

Rachael turned back to Denise, "Bye for now."

"We'll talk soon," Denise replied as Rachael turned to exit the building.

++++++++++++++ Rachael floated back the office at Complete Women's Health.

"Well..." Chris asked as she entered the shop.

"They will be making their decision next week."

"What did you think?"

"Wow, what a beautiful place, and everyone was so nice."

"Do you think you'll get it?" Chris asked.

"I feel really good. They were very impressed with my references and I think the interview went well."

"That would be grand. If you went to work for the company, do you think I could get a better discount?" Chris joked.

"I'm not sure about that, but I could probably make sure that you got on the Christmas Card list."

"You are a hard case."

The ringing of the phone sent Rachael back to work.

For the next week, Rachael was on pins and needles. On Wednesday afternoon, Rachael received the call.

"Complete Women's Health, this is Rachael."

"Hi Rachael, this is Denise Walker from Normacare."

"Hello..."

"Congratulations, you got the job."

Rachael was sobbing, "That's wonderful!"

"By the time you get home this evening, an offer letter will have been brought over by courier. Please look it over and give us a call back if the terms are acceptable."

"I can't wait to see it."

"Everything is as we discussed with a few more details about salary and benefits. Oh, and when do you think you might like to start?"

"I'd like to discuss it with Chris, but would the fifth of the month, next Wednesday, work OK."

"Yes, that would work fine. Please be sure to let me know if you have any questions about the offer. My contact information is in with the offer letter."

"Thank you SO much, Denise. I look forward to working with you."

"Me too, Rachael. Talk to you soon."

"Bye..."

Rachael dropped the phone and almost fell out of the chair. She rose and ran to Chris' office.

"Chris, I got it..."

"The job at Normacare?!?"

"YES!"

Chris jumped up and hugged Rachael tightly. "This is fantastic news- and it is great that Dianne will be here this weekend. We can all celebrate! When would they like you to start?"

"I told them that I would need to talk to you, but they agreed that I could start next Wednesday."

"That will work fine," Chris said with a smile.

"I thought that I might be able to work Monday and Tuesday here," Rachael continued, "and then work the later part of the week at Normacare. That would allow April to come back part time to start."

"That sounds great, but unless I miss my guess you will end up working full-time before long."

"We'll see, I'll take it one step at a time. If it is OK, I'd like to call Dianne and let her know."

"Sure, tell her I said hello."

++++++++++++++

Amber sat in the lunchroom at Normacare gazing out the window toward the courtyard. She turned to see one of the other sales agents walking toward her table. Heather was short, cute and had a great attitude. Everyone got along with her.

"Hi Amber, can I have a seat?"

"Sure, just enjoying the view."

"Are there any cute guys out there?" Heather asked.

"No, they mowed the lawn yesterday."

"I'm sorry I missed that!"

Amber and Heather discussed the weather, the upcoming company picnic and, of course, men.

"Hey, Amber, you know the person that they just hired- Rachael?"

"Sure!"

"She works over at Complete, don't she?"

"Yes, she is filling in for April."

"What happened to April?" Heather asked.

"Maternity leave."

"Oh, I was wondering. Anyway, the reason that I was asking about Rachael was one of the people from marketing seemed to be very interested in her. You know that Rachael used to be a guy?"

"I've never asked, but I think she still is. I just know that Rachael is friendly, considerate and has a great sense of fashion. I just wish all men were like that," Amber said with a smile.

"I met Rachael when she was in last week. I thought she was cool. It was just that one of the marketing people is kind of upset."

"Which one of the marketing people is it?"

"Karen, the kind of older lady."

"What did she say?"

"Oh, not much, but when she asked what I thought about Rachael coming to work here she kind of freaked out."

"Why?"

"She asked me if I was concerned and I told her no. I said that it sounded like fun. I really don't know why I said that but I couldn't think of anything else to say."

Amber's expression darkened.

Heather continued, "I can't figure out why she was so interested. She says company is screwing up by hiring Rachael."

"Some people just need to feel like they are the one running things."

"I guess it must be something like that..."

++++++++++++++ Chris squinted at the sign above the terminal exit.

"The plane from L.A. landed right on time, Dianne should be here any minute," Chris said.

They watched weary travelers come up the escalator when the finally spotted Dianne in a thick group of passengers.

"Dianne--" Chris yelled, waving frantically.

As Dianne approached, the two ladies flashed wide smiles.

"How was the trip?" Rachael asked, giving Dianne a hug.

"So- so. I'm glad to be here."

Chris collected a hug and the ladies moved toward baggage claim.

They visited for a short while before they saw Dianne's bags on the carousel. Rachael went to grab them and young man offered to lift the bags off for her.

"Thank you," Rachael said to the helpful stranger.

"No problem, Ma'am."

Rachael moved the handle into position, hung the second bag on a hook, and rolled the bags toward the parking lot.

"Where is your hotel?" Chris asked.

"It is 'The Standard' in Northside."

"Nice digs," Chris chided.

"Let's go check this out!" Rachael added enthusiastically, "Are you hungry Dianne?"

"A little bit. There are supposed to be several restaurants right around the hotel."

After a light meal they checked Dianne into her hotel room. Chris was right about the hotel, it was quite elegant.

"It's getting a little bit late, but would anyone be up for a glass of wine or a nightcap? There is a bar downstairs," Chris said.

"What do you think, Dianne?" Rachael asked.

"Well, I'm not all that tired, of course it is an hour earlier for me. Let's go!"

The ladies entered the bar and found a quiet table on the far side of the room.

"What would you like, Rachael," Chris offered.

"A white wine, Pinot Grigio or something like that."

"And you, Dianne, still sticking with White Zin?" Chris asked.

"That sounds fine to me."

"I'll let you two visit, I'll be right back," Chris said, heading toward the bar.

"Great news about your new job, Rachael."

"I'm really excited, but I'm scared at the same time."

"You said the same thing when you started to work for Chris, you'll do fine."

"I'm not even sure what I will be doing yet." Rachael whined.

"Then how do you know that you won't be able to do it?" Dianne challenged, "Same old Er... Rachael, you always need something to worry about."

"I guess you're right. I really like the people that I will be working with."

"Well, that is a big hurdle past right there!"

"And what about your promotion, I assume it is a go?" Rachael inquired.

"Yes, they are talking about me moving here the beginning of next month. That gives me a few weeks to get everything ready."

"Do I need to come to LA to help move?" Rachael asked.

"No, the movers will take care of everything. I just need to find us somewhere to live. I was thinking about a Duplex or something like that."

"There are some nice places up by where Chris lives. Would that be close to where you are going to work?"

"I think so, we'll have to check them out."

Rachael glanced out of the corner of her eye and noticed Chris talking to a man at the bar.

"Check this out," Rachael snickered, directing Dianne's gaze toward Chris.

"That looks like Greg Ballard. He went to High School with Chris and I!"

In a bit Chris came back to the table with the glasses of wine.

"Was that Greg Ballard?" Dianne asked.

"Yes, he is working downtown, he's a salesman for some insurance company."

"Small world... is he married?" Dianne asked.

"You're awful, Dianne."

"Well, is he?"

"He's divorced," Chris said with a shrug, "How is your wine, Rachael?"

"Great... tell me more about this Greg person," Rachael probed.

"He's just someone that I went out with a couple of times in High School, nothing special."

"Did you give him your number?" Dianne asked with a smirk.

"You are terrible!" Chris shot back. She hesitated slightly and then admitted that she had.

"That's my little sister!" Dianne cheered, giving Rachael a high-five.

The ladies talked for a bit and then Dianne asked, "Rachael, are you planning to stay with Chris tonight?"

"Ahh, I didn't know what to expect. I have an overnight bag in the car."

"Well, Chris might want to invite Greg over for a cup of coffee. Maybe you should stay with me tonight."

"That sounds great, Dianne, as long as it won't be...ah....any..."

"It will be fine," Dianne said.

++++++++++++++

Denise Walker was closing the blinds against the afternoon sun. The weather was fantastic the whole weekend and Monday had brought another beautiful day. She thought about the reports that were keeping her from going home and enjoying the rest of the day. A light tap on her door caught her attention. She looked toward the open door to see a slight, middle aged lady wearing beige slacks and a plain white blouse.

"Come in Karen," Denise said with a smile.

"Can I close the door?" Karen asked hesitantly, her expression unreadable.

"Sure!"

Karen secured the door and took a seat looking across the broad desk. Denise sat in a chair to face her.

"I'm a little concerned about something," Karen started, hesitantly.

"OK, is it something at home or at work?" Denise probed.

"Here- to be honest this is about your new employee," Karen replied, shifting uncomfortably.

"Which employee are you talking about?"

"That guy, or whatever you call it, that you are hiring."

"Are we talking about Rachael?"

"Yes, that is what all the girls are calling him. What's his real name, Randy or something?"

"His given name is Eric," Denise said flatly, "So you have a problem with his name?"

"No, I have a problem with HIM?" Karen continued with increasing agitation.

"OK, please explain. Did Rachael say something to make you uncomfortable?"

"No, not exactly."

"Do you know her?" Denise continued, puzzled.

"What is this thing with everyone referring to him as a her, yuck!"

"Just where are you coming from with this?"

"Some Drag Queen waltzes in here wearing a dress and a wig and everyone goes crazy," Karen said, glaring at Denise, "Why is it you want to turn this fantastic organization into some kind of freak show?"

"This attitude is really troubling, let's get back- have you met her?"

"No, dammit, what difference does that make?"

"Well, it would help explain your reaction." Denise said, unconsciously twisting her bracelet in agitation.

"It just so happens that I checked this stuff out on some websites. Why does this company want to get in the business of selling these creatures breast forms. We ought to be getting them psychiatric help, or shock treatments- or putting them in jail."

"So you have done all of your research about cross-dressing on the Internet?"

"Don't patronize me," Karen hissed, "If you want to hire this dumbo, fine, just keep this thing away from me."

"That is going to be a bit of a problem. With you being in marketing we will be counting on you to assist Rachael with some of her activities."

"That's sick. I suppose I'll have to share a bathroom with him too?"

"Is that what this is all about?"

"Look, I have a husband and a teenager at home. I get enough urine on the toilet seat there without having to put up with it at work. I guess I'll have to start putting the seat down here too."

"Anything else?"

"I just don't get it. All of the telemarketers are excited about having this weirdo working here. I bet after a couple of weeks everyone will start looking for other jobs."

"It may be that the sales agents actually know Rachael and don't see her as any kind of a threat to them." Denise said, angrily.

"This goof-ball is certainly not any threat to me!" Karen roared, her face flushed.

"OK, let's try to be civil." Denise said after a deep breath, "If the restroom thing is going to be a problem, we will try to work around that."

"How shallow do you think I am?" Karen said, crossing her arms in front of her.

Denise hesitated, and then continued. "OK, what other accommodations do you think we are going to need."

"How about a pink-slip?"

"For Rachael," Denise started, trying to keep her anger in check, "or for someone else?"

"I see I'm getting nowhere here..." Karen huffed.

"I think you have given me a pretty good picture of your concerns. The only trouble that I have is all of your information seems to have come from porn sites on the Internet. I've yet to hear any indication that you are willing to give this new employee or the project that she has been brought in to coordinate any consideration at all. I am very perplexed by this. You are a valued employee and we have always been able to count on you to be fair. This is a new problem for me and, frankly, something that I didn't expect."

Karen shifted in her seat but remained silent.

"I will try to work through this with you," Denise said, her voice softening. "Rachael starts work here on Wednesday. I would like to meet with you at the end of the day Friday so I can address any concerns that arise."

"Oh, so that's how this is going to work..." Karen said, raising from her chair.

"One other thing," Denise started, hesitantly, "Our company policy is pretty clear on fostering a diverse workplace. Please avoid any situation that might create a hostile work environment or might otherwise be considered discriminatory."

"Anything else?"

"Please... You were right to come to me with this concern and I want to do everything that I can to make sure you feel comfortable here. I am willing to work through this with you."

With that, Karen turned and exited the room in silence.

++++++++++

Rachael entered Normacare a few minutes before 9:00 AM Wednesday morning. For her first day, she dressed a bit more formally wearing a black suit, a blue-striped blouse and low-heeled shoes. Donna greeted her with a warm smile.

"Nice to see you again. Denise asked that I give her a call when you got in. She has a bit of an orientation planned."

"Thanks, Donna," Rachael replied, taking a seat. Denise entered the reception area a few minutes later. Rachael noted the sense of style and bearing of a woman in charge. Her navy slacks and patterned blouse spoke of grace and style.

"Ready?" Denise asked.

"Ready!"

"OK, let's pop back to my office and get some paperwork finished and then we can walk around for a bit."

"Fantastic!"

They chatted during the brief walk to her office and then spent the next half hour filling out forms. All pretty routine, with the exception that Rachael had to use the name 'Eric' on several of the forms. With that work completed, Denise took Rachael around the building.

As they walked out of the lunch room and past the restrooms, Denise became pensive. "Rachael, your special 'circumstance' is going to necessitate a rather bizarre request."

"I understand," Rachael assured, "I really do."

"I REALLY hate to ask this, but rather than using the ladies room here, I would like to have you consider using the one down toward the warehouse."

Rachael halted and looked toward her. "Denise, I have been out a lot dressed as a woman and I am definitely aware that if I am going to have a problem with my being accepted it will be while I am in the ladies room."

"It's just that the restroom that I am suggesting is a single and there should be no privacy issue there."

"I assure you that it will be much less stressful for me also."

Denise sighed, "I'm really sorry."

"Don't be," Rachael said assuredly, "I am willing to do whatever is necessary for people to feel comfortable with me."

They had toured most of the offices and Rachael found the employees to be outgoing and friendly. Denise hesitated and then entered the marketing department. As they came in, Rachael noticed one of the employees exit the room through a rear door. As she spoke to some of the people, she felt a bit more distance then she had encountered in the other departments, but the people offered congratulations on her new position and expressed the desire to assist where they could. Rachael thanked them, knowing that marketing was going to be one of the elements that was going to be needed to need to make the new project a success.

"Well, Rachael, with the exception of the warehouse and the production floor, that is who we are. We'll give you some time to settle in and then we can show you the shop and shipping and receiving. It won't mean much right now anyway."

"I have too many names to remember now as it is," Rachael replied.

"OK, let's go see your office," Denise said, directing the way down a long hallway.

"Wow, this is wonderful," Rachael gasped as she walked through the doorway marked 'Rachael Jeffreys'"

"Let's turn on you computer and make sure that all of the accounts have been set up."

Rachael learned that she had two e-mail accounts, one for Rachael and one for Eric, and that in addition to a regular phone line that routed through the switchboard, she had a private number that only rang on her phone. She also had a separate fax number.

"I'm very happy that you have been able to make these arrangements with the telephone and fax. That will make it much less of a problem communicating with those who are more secretive."

"After our discussion, I talked to some of the legal people, and they are working on some privacy policies that will cover some of your sensitive communications. I'm sure Harry Wales will be by to go over some of this with you. We've ordered some locking file cabinets for your office. We have also changed the lock on the door and only yourself and the head of security have a copy of the key," Denise said, handing her an envelope.

"Fantastic,"

"Let's see if you can get logged into the computer and then I'll let you start looking over some of our new employee orientation material."

About noon, Denise popped back into the office and invited Rachael to lunch.

"I'd like Carmine to go with us if that's all right, she is the head of marketing."

"Great, I imagine that I will be leaning on marketing quite a bit once I get going."

Denise smiled.

Carmine was a vivacious black lady with a broad smile and a quick wit. Rachael remembered her from earlier that morning. The three discussed the options for lunch and decided on a sandwich shop a few blocks from Normacare.

As they waited for their food to arrive, they chatted.

"Rachael, I hope this doesn't sound like prying, but are you married?" Carmine said.

"Yes, I have a great wife..." Rachael winced at how strange that sounded, "We've been together many years."

"Any children?" Denise asked.

"No, we were close once but Dianne lost the child. They suggested that we should adopt rather than having a child of our own."

"That's sad," Carmine said, "I'm so sorry for you guys."

"We discussed adopting, but our lives have been a bit chaotic and we wanted to get settled down first."

The discussion ebbed for a bit when Denise's name was called. She retrieved the order and brought it back to the table.

As they ate, Carmine opened the conversation about Rachael's new position. "I think I understand a little bit about what we are hoping to do, but I was hoping that you two could fill me in."

Denise glossed over some of the basics, and then indicated that Rachael could add some additional detail about transgender issues.

"Charmine, I'd like to start out saying that I'm very excited to be part of this opportunity. For too long the transgendered community have been characterized as a perversion with most people getting their information from X-Rated magazines or sleazy Internet sites."

Rachael didn't like the way the last statement came across, so she continued in a softer voice, "I really don't know what drives me to want experience life as a woman, but it is really not a choice for me. I don't know how many times I have tried to ignore the compulsion, but it always returns, stronger than ever."

"You mentioned a wife, how does this work with her?" Carmine asked.

"My wife is as confused and perplexed as anyone. We have gone through some really rough times, but she has finally come to accept me as I am."

Charmine puzzled over this last piece of information.

"I should probably add that she does not relate to me sexually in my female persona. She informs me that she married a man and she expects her husband to be a man."

"Well, I must admit that you make a very lovely woman, and I would judge you would be an equally handsome gentleman."

"Thank you very much. The hair and nails make it a bit of a challenge for the male persona, but we adapt," Rachael added, causing the diners to start laughing.

After lunch, the three returned to Normacare. Carmine asked Rachael if she could drop by her office as she had something else that she wanted to discuss. Denise went back to her office and Rachael accompanied Carmine to the marketing department. Rachael settled into a chair as Carmine took a seat behind the desk.

"Rachael, I wanted to get started on a marketing plan for you but because we have never done anything quite like this, I wanted to get a bit more information."

"Sure, I'm glad to help!"

"Firstly, marketing is all about motivation. I would really like to understand a bit more about the target market so that we can develop an effective campaign," Carmine said with a smile.

"Wow, I never thought of myself as a target market..." Rachael joked.

"What will be the product differentiators that we will be able to use to make our brand more attractive."

"There are several that I can think of- providing expertise, quality, a comfortable purchase experience and privacy. All in all, it will only be a slight re-tool of what you provide for your mastectomy patients already."

Carmine nodded, "I agree."

"Quality will be one area that will need to be emphasized. Unlike a mastectomy patient, the transgender customer will normally not use the product on a daily basis. Your female patients will have insurance coverage for the purchase, but for these new customers, everything is going to be full retail. Added to that there will always be two forms needed so this will be a rather sizable investment. We will need to provide some strong motivation for making such a substantial purchase."

"What is our competition?"

"Just about everything- rolled up stockings, bags of rice, water balloons, foam breast enhancers and less expensive forms. Most of them have the benefit of being cheaper but don't have the same effect."

"Which is?"

"Exactly what a woman seeks in a form, a profile that compliments their body type, a natural look, feel and movement that simulates the real thing."

"If I may ask- what are you wearing?"

"Certainly, Normacare light triangular."

"Your thoughts about the product?"

"I love them. Prior to these I had a less expensive silicone form but they just didn't move right."

"How significant was the difference?"

"I would say subtitle, yet dramatic. I immediately fell in love with the forms as they felt so much more natural."

"I have heard that same comment from our women patients. Let me visit with some of my people and I'll see what we can come up with for a sales piece. Thanks so much for your help, Rachael!"

"Thank you for the nice lunch," Rachael replied as she turned to leave the office.

On the way back to her office, Denise called to her.

"I wanted to give you the information for your employment physical," Denise announced.

"Ah, I had forgotten about that..." Rachael replied sheepishly. It was more like she hoped it would go away.

"Do you have a Doctor in the area?" Denise asked, sympathetic to Rachael's nervousness.

"No..."

"Let me suggest my doctor to you," Denise said, writing the information on a piece of paper, "She is great and I think you will get along fine."

"What needs to be done?" Rachael asked.

"Just some lab and a quick physical, nothing heavy-duty. It will probably only take a couple of hours." Denise said, handing the paper to Rachael.

"OK, I'll give the office a call and get something set up."

"Rachael, if you don't mind, I can call and get everything set up for you. Would Tuesday of next week work out OK?"

"Sure," she replied, somehow sensing that Denise would smooth the way for her.

++++++++++

Karen Rogers mind was still on the new employee as she waited for her daughter that evening. Her previous concerns had not been borne out- Rachael was certainly not the stereotypical Drag Queen that she had expected and so she was more puzzled now than ever.

Karen glanced at the parking lot of a local salad-bar restaurant. She and her daughter were having their regular Thursday evening meal and, as usual, Sandy was late. Sandra was a third-year student at a college in Colorado Springs. She was living off-campus but mom and daughter still got together regularly to catch up. Karen waved as she saw Sandy come through the front door.

"Hi, Mom, how's things?" Sandra asked brightly. She was the typical college student, straight blond hair, blue jeans and sweatshirt.

"Hi, kiddo. Things are pretty weird, but I'm holding in there."

They ate dinner and got caught up about Sandy's classes and boyfriends. Karen turned quiet and Sandy could sense that something was wrong.

"What's the matter, Mom?" Sandy asked.

"What do you know about transvestites?" Karen asked.

"Oh, I was wondering when you were going to find out," Sandy said with a long exhalation.

"Well, it's just that we have one at work now."

Sandra stammered for a few seconds and then started awkwardly, "I really don't know that much about... them... that..."

"What did you mean about my finding out?"

"Mom..."

"Come on, do you know somebody like that?"

"I really shouldn't say, Mom. I promised."

"Is it someone at school?"

"Please Mom, don't make me say any more."

"Well, I just need to find out more about these people. If you know somebody it would really help."

"Mom, you don't understand..."

"You're lying to me..."

"I promised..."

"I'm your mother."

Sandra held a nervous silence.

"I won't tell anyone."

"It wouldn't matter," Sandra answered.

"Is it your boyfriend?"

"No!"

"Then who?"

"Brad..."

"Which Brad?" Karen continued nervously.

"Mother, it's my brother Brad!" Sandy said, followed by a deep sigh.

Karen Rogers was silent for a long time.

"Are you OK, Mom?"

"This can't be. How would you know and I don't? I don't believe you!"

"Fine!"

"Don't 'Fine' me little lady. When I tell your father what you said about your brother he is going to go nuts. You may living on your own but we still expect you respect your parents- and your brother. Why would you say such a thing?"

"Because it's true."

"I would know if it were true!" Karen said with a bit more agitation.

"Whatever..."

"You need to explain yourself!"

"Here?" Sandra said, looking around.

"Yes, here!"

"OK, before I left for school I threw out couple of pair of panties and some pantyhose with a run in them. A short time later they ended up disappearing from the trash. I didn't think too much about it, but later I noticed one of the pairs of panties in Brad's room."

Karen listened in silence.

"It kind of freaked me out. My first thought was he was doing something perverted with them. I confronted Brad about it and he got all defensive, tore them up and threw them away."

"OK, I don't understand how that makes Brad a transvestite."

"Well, I came home one day and he was in his room wearing the other pair of panties. I made him tell me what he was doing and he broke down and cried." Sandra's eye's filled with tears, "Mom, he cried and asked me not to tell anyone."

"You should have told me!" Karen said, shocked.

"I promised. Besides, he trusted me."

"What did you do?"

"I told him that I was very uncomfortable with him wearing my underwear and made him throw all of my used clothes away. When he agreed I told him I would buy him some of his own. Mom, he was so happy I thought he would bust."

"And?"

"I did what I promised... I bought him a couple of pairs of panties, some pantyhose, a bra and a camisole. You would have thought I gave him a new car! He thanked me over and over."

"Anything else?"

"Well, one time when you and Dad were out of town, I borrowed a wig and some clothes from Tina and dressed Brad all up."

"What do you mean all up?"

"Well, skirt, blouse, underwear, hose, bra, a wig, shoes, and we did some makeup."

Karen's expression was unreadable. "Then what did you do?"

"Tina, myself and Brenda, that is what we called Brad, all went to a movie."

"Sandra Rogers, I am so angry right now..." Karen said, her eyes narrowing.

"Mom," Sandra pleaded, "He told me it was the best day of his life."

"I don't even know what to say. If I would have caught you I would have turned you both over my knee, and maybe Tina too. How could you be so dumb!"

"We didn't hurt anyone."

"What do you mean, you might have scarred your brother for life."

"Mother, he wanted to. As a matter of fact I finally had to threaten him to get him out of Tina's clothes when we got home. He stood for a half an hour staring at himself in the mirror."

"This is not helping me one bit with my problem at work. Just wait until I get home, I want to go over all of this with Brad."

"Mother, please don't make a big deal out of this!"

"It's sick and perverted and I won't have it in my house. Either the panties go or he does."

"Please, mother, don't say that! I love Brad, and I love him even more that he shared this secret with me. He is not sick, he is just Brad and I think he is the best brother a girl could have."

The rest of the dinner was a lot of silence interspersed with awkward attempts at conversation. Sandy heart ached that she betrayed Brad's trust. Karen and Sandra parted amicably, but both were troubled by the revelation that came over dinner.

When Karen returned home she chose not to confront Brad with her newly gained knowledge. She didn't know what to do and needed some time to sort things out.

++++++++++

On Friday, Rachael continued to settle into her new job. As she was putting together some contact lists, her phone rang.

"Normacare, this is Rachael."

"Hello, Rachael, this is Richard from the Denver Renaissance group."

"Hi Roxanne, I was thinking about contacting you."

"Well, I was talking to some of the board members and we were wondering if you would consider becoming a member of our group. I know that you said that you were a member of a group in L.A. but since you were going to be in the area for a little while...."

"Actually, my wife will be moving here in about a month so it looks like we are going to be here permanently."

"All the better!"

Rachael and Roxanne discussed some details of the upcoming meeting and some of the information about her becoming a member of the group.

"I called Chris and she said that you got a new job," Roxanne continued, "She said it wouldn't be a problem for me to call. So you are at Normacare now?"

"Yes, I'm working part time here and still a couple of days a week with Chris."

"How perfect is that!"

"Roxanne, it's great that you called. I was wanting to talk to you...." Rachael continued, giving her a few details about the program she was getting set up. Roxanne was hardly able to contain her enthusiasm.

"When you and Chris were at the meeting everyone commented on how wonderful that was. I'm glad that someone is considering taking that kind of thing nationally."

"Roxanne, do you have an e-mail address that I could use to contact you. I promise I won't be a pest but I would like a way to get in touch with you if something comes up between meetings."

"Rachael honey, better than that, how about my cell phone number?"

++++++++++

As agreed, at the end of the day on Friday Karen Rogers arrived at Denise's office and tapped on the door.

"Hello, Karen, please come in and close the door."

Karen did so and then took the chair opposite Denise.

"So, how are things," Denise started, trying to read Karen's expression.

"I'm still a bit confused, but in seeing how Rachael is fitting in I'm not quite so concerned as I was. I'm sorry that I went off like that the other day."

"Karen, I'm just gratified that you shared your concerns with me. I like to foster that type of environment here."

Karen still looked troubled.

"Is there something else?" Denise asked.

"Nothing that I am ready to get into right now. It's something at home."

"Really, Karen, if there is anything that I can do to help, or if you just need someone to talk to, please let me know. I hope that you feel that you can confide in me."

"Yes, Denise, and thank you but it is still a bit early to involve someone else."

"You know best."

"I'll let you get back, but for now I'm willing to give Rachael a chance to prove hi... herself."

"Karen, you don't know how much that means to me."

With that, Karen left the office and a weight was lifted from Denise's shoulders.

++++++++++

Karen Rogers convinced her husband and son that they should go to a baseball game Friday evening.

"Kevin, you and Brad haven't been to a game all season. The team will be heading to the finals if they win this game. You need to be there to cheer them on."

Brad looked at his father, "You really don't have to go if you don't want to, Dad," Brad said.

"Don't be silly. Your mother's right, we haven't gone out just the two of us for a long time."

"Sounds great..." Brad said, his voice betraying his true feelings.

Once the sports fans had left the house, Karen went about going through Brad's room. It didn't take long to find the items that she had been told to expect. True to Sandy's information, she found several pair of panties, some pantyhose, a bra, camisole and a number of other feminine items. She was relieved to find that none of the items were hers. She switched on his computer and spent some time trying to hack out the password without success.

When the sports fans came home several hours later, Karen was curled up on the sofa reading a magazine.

"How did the game go?"

"We lost," Kevin said.

"Yeah, but at least the final score was close," Brad offered.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Well, hun, I'm going to turn in," Brad's father said, kissing Karen on the forehead.

"I'll be up in a minute," Karen said, "Brad, why don't you sit here for a minute and we can visit."

After several awkward moments of conversation, Brad also left to turn in. Try as she might, Karen could not figure out how to broach the subject of the female clothing that she found earlier that evening. After Brad left the room, Karen spent the next half hour contemplating the events of the past week. She needed someone who she could talk to about this, someone who could help her understand just what was going on with Brad. The logical person occurred to her, but the thought troubled her almost as much as Brad's femininity. She swallowed hard knowing just how difficult this was going to be for her.

++++++++++

After a long weekend of reflection, Karen resolved what she needed to do- she would talk to Rachael about her son. When she arrived at work on Monday, she was somewhat shocked to see that Rachael was not in the office. As she passed the lunchroom, she spotted Heather and figured that she might know what time Rachael normally got to work. Karen greeted her.

"Oh, hi, Karen," Heather said hesitantly.

"Heather, do you know when Rachael usually comes in to work?"

"Ah, Rachael only works part time. I don't think she will be in until Wednesday."

Karen's look of disappointment puzzled Heather.

"I think she is still working at Complete Women's Health. You can probably reach her there."

"I hate to be a bother, thanks anyway... Well back to work," Karen said, adjourning toward her office.

After an hour of hesitation, Karen picked up the phone for what had to be the tenth time. This time she actually dialed the number.

"Complete Women's Health, this is Rachael."

"Rachael, My name is Karen Rogers, I work at Normacare."

"Hello, Karen. I'm sorry but if we've met I can't place you. How can I help you today?"

"Well, it's a little bit difficult..."

"Is it about a customer issue?"

"No, more personal."

"Please, let me know what I can do to help."

Karen struggled with what to say next. She had practiced the conversation all morning but now she was loosing it. "Rachael, is there any way we could meet for lunch? Somewhere quiet where I could confide something to you."

"Sure, if you would like a sandwich, Maxie's is a great place right over by the office. Across the street is a park, we could pick up lunch and find a quiet picnic table."

"That would be fine, Rachael. Thank you very much for your understanding."

"I just hope that I can help. I'll meet you at 11:45 if that will be OK. Will I recognize you?"

"I'll find you, Rachael. See you soon."

++++++++++

Rachael was walking in the front door of Maxie's when Karen came up and introduced herself. Rachael remembered seeing Karen at work but it puzzled her why they were never introduced. After placing their orders and some small talk, they took their lunch to the park across the street. They found an out of the way bench and spread out their meal.

"Karen, you work in the marketing department?" Rachael asked.

"Yes, Carmine is my supervisor."

"Carmine is great, you are really lucky to have such a great person to work with. Of course, all of the people that I have met at Normacare are just fantastic."

Karen shifted uncomfortably, tensed, and then continued, "Rachael, I have a concern about my son, and I think you might be able to give me some guidance."

Rachael felt on edge, figuring where this was probably heading. "I'll help any way I can."

"I think that my son is... ah... a... likes to... ah."

"Karen, are you concerned that you son is transgendered?"

"Transgendered?!? Yes, I think that may be it."

"Has he discussed it with you?"

Karen shook her head no.

"How did you learn about this?"

"From his sister, and, well... I found some clothing in his room. I don't know what to do about this."

"What are you considering?"

"Getting him some help, I guess."

"Counseling?"

"Yes."

"In my opinion, your son should really be included in a decision like that. Is your son depressed, or anxious, or doing anything to lead you to think he is mentally ill?"

"NO!!!"

"I'm sorry, Karen, I'm just trying to help."

"I know," her voice softening, "I'm just a little upset about all of this."

"Karen, if you go to someone for counseling, I would search for someone who is familiar with gender disorders- it's a rather specialized field. I know someone that helped us in LA, but I'm not familiar with anyone in this area."

"You say he helped you, what do you mean?"

"Helped us, my wife and I both saw him. He assured me that I was well adjusted and healthy, but I just had a part of my personality that we needed to come to grips with. He worked with Dianne to assure her that I didn't want to leave her and this was something that with love and understanding we could work through."

"But you haven't been able to stop?"

"Karen, believe me, I couldn't anymore make this stop than I could keep from growing hair. This is who I am. It has been this way since I was twelve."

Karen dropped her head and listened in silence.

"If I could recommend anything to you, it would be to help your son feel that this is not the end of the world, but the beginning of a better one. Your whole family will go through a whole range of emotions. You have to cling together, support one another and love each other more than you ever thought possible."

"Should I tell Brad's father?"

"I would suggest that you let your son make that decision- of course that's up to you."

Karen fell silent again.

"I know some people in a local transgender group, people a lot like Brad. I can give you information on how to contact them."

"Would you be willing to talk to Brad?"

"If he feels like it I would certainly be willing to speak with him. I'm certainly no substitute for a counselor or a support group, but I might be able to help him understand some of the things that he is feeling."

"Should I tell him that I know about it?"

"Karen, it is going to be much better that way than having you or his father come home some time and catch him. It will happen sooner or later."

"What do I say?"

"First, tell him that you love him. Say that you know his secret about women's clothes and that you are open to talking with him about it when he is ready."

"Then what?"

"Wait for him, he might come to you right away, or it may take some time, but when he is ready he will come to you. I bet that he wants to tell you and is just waiting for the right time."

"Then what do I do?"

"You will know because he will tell you. Do what your heart tells you is right."

"This is all so upsetting!"

"Karen, you will get through it. Please feel free to contact me whenever you want."

They finished up their lunch in silence and walked toward the parking lot. Then, out of nowhere, Karen hugged Rachael tightly and thanked her for the help. She turned and walked to her car deep in thought.

++++++++++

Karen didn't even remember the trip back to Normacare. Her mind was racing- she was alternately confused and then angry, but nothing felt right. As she entered the building, she saw Denise.

"Is everything OK, Karen, you look troubled."

"I'm not sure, I think I would like to talk to you if now is a good time," Karen said hesitantly.

"Alright, let's go back to my office."

As they stepped into the office, Denise closed the door and then took sat on a chair adjacent to Karen.

"I had lunch with Rachael," Karen started and then stopped, knowing how odd that sounded.

Denise tensed, "Oh..."

"Well, actually something came up at home and Rachael was able to give me some unique insights about it."

"I'm still a bit confused," Denise said.

"I think my son is a transvestite, or I guess the better term is transgendered."

"Was Rachael able to help?"

"I think so. I am really feeling bad about the way I acted."

"Does she know anything about that?" Denise asked.

"I don't know, nothing was said."

"There is no reason to change that, Karen."

"Thank you. Rachael was very accommodating and was able to give me some advise."

"Is there anything that you need from me?"

"Maybe get my son a discount on some breast forms..." Karen joked, just before her eyes filled with tears and she began to sob.

"Karen, this is something that we will work through together. Believe me it will work out OK."

Her voice cracked, "I just don't know what I could have done to cause this. Maybe I just tried to hard."

"Karen, believe me you didn't cause any of this. It is like a person's fingerprints- each of us are unique."

"I just want to do the right thing."

"We have a program here at Normacare where we can help you find mental health resources, someone that you can talk to about this."

"That's one of the things Rachael suggested."

"Why don't you let me do some checking on that."

"Thank you, Denise. I probably need to get back to work."

"Karen, if you want, you might think about leaving a little early today."

"Thanks, I might do that," she said, lifting from her chair and crossing the office.

"Thanks for listening," Karen said, opening the door.

"Any time."

++++++++++

After giving it quite a bit of thought, Rachael decided to give Roxanne a call.

"Hello, this is Richard," said the voice on the other end of the line.

"Hi, this is Rachael, can we talk," Rachael continued, hesitantly.

"Sure, Hi Rachael."

"Hi Roxanne," They visited for a bit and Rachael got to the reason for the call. "I had lunch with someone who might be interested in a counselor who deals with gender issues."

"We have a local psychologist who is wonderful."

"Can I get the name so that I can pass it on to my friend?"

"Sure, it is Lauren Woodard. I don't have her number right now but she is with Northside Mental Health."

"I'll look her up and see if I can get her number. I'm really looking forward to the next meeting."

"Everyone is looking forward to seeing you again."

"Thanks a million, Roxanne."

"No problem, honey. See you soon."

Rachael had no problem locating Dr. Woodard's information in the telephone book. She wrote it all down to give it to Karen when she got back to work on Wednesday. As soon as she put the paper in her purse, the telephone rang.

"Complete Women's Health, this is Rachael."

"Hi Rachael, it's Denise."

"Hi."

"I understood that you had lunch with one of our marketing people today."

"Yes, was there a problem?"

"Oh, no. It's just that after Karen came back to work we had a brief visit."

"Is she OK, this thing we discussed was bothering her quite a bit. I don't know if I was able to help her very much."

"Quite the contrary, she was relieved after talking to you."

"That's great news."

"Rachael, one of the things that she mentioned was your suggestion of locating a counselor. I was hoping there was someone you could recommend."

"Actually, I just got off of the phone with one of my sisters and she gave me the recommendation of someone. Here, let me get you the information."

Rachael retrieved the information from her purse and passed the details on to Denise.

"I knew I could count on you, thank you Rachael."

"I'm glad I could help. Let me know if there is anything else."

"Please drop by my office when you get in on Wednesday."

"OK, bye for now," Rachael said, returning the phone to the cradle. ++++++++++

Armed with the name of the counselor and the advice from Rachael, Karen steeled herself to have a visit with Brad. She had come home a little early that afternoon, knowing that her son would be home about four PM.

"Hi, Mom," he said coming into the house, "You're home a little early. Is everything OK at work."

"Well, actually I wanted to get a chance to talk to you before your father got home."

"Is anything wrong," Brad asked, his face mirroring his concern.

"It's just I've become aware of something and I wanted to get a chance to talk to you about it."

"OK," Brad said, hesitantly.

"First off, I want you to know that I love you more than anything and that you mean the world to me..."

"Is there something wrong between you and dad?" Brad asked, alarmed.

"Brad, nothing like that. I've been thinking a lot about this and I wanted to let you know that you were always free to share things with me. Sometimes I might not understand what you are feeling, but I will always make the attempt to be fair."

Brad froze.

"Honey, I just wanted to let you know that I know about the interest you have in women's clothes. I just wanted to let you know that I am here to talk to you about it when you're ready."

Panic seized Brad, but Karen did not pressure him.

Karen's heart was in her throat, but she remained calm. "I hope you understand that I am willing to talk when you want to." With that, she rose and went into the kitchen saying that she was going to start dinner.

Brad sat in silence for a long while and then walked into the kitchen.

"Mom, I think I would like to talk to you about this."

While they sat at the kitchen table, Brad told his mother about how he had 'borrowed' his sister's clothes since he was about ten. Between sobs he related the many times that he had almost been caught and all of the attempts that he had made to stop.

"I don't know why I feel this way," Brad said.

"Brad, I really do understand. From what I have been able to learn this is not that unusual. There are some very healthy and well-adjusted people that feel this way."

Her son remained silent as he absorbed the information.

"Are you going to tell Dad?" Brad inquired.

"Not unless you want me to," Karen said, "Is that what you want?"

"Not quite yet. It is enough of an adjustment for me that you know."

"I don't want to force you into anything but when you are ready we can tell him together."

Brad jumped up and hugged his mother so tightly she could hardly catch her breath.

"Are we going to be OK?" Karen asked.

"Mother, you don't know how much of a burden this has been to me."

"I have some other things that I can offer, but only when you are ready."

Brad looked at his mother with concern.

"I have the name of a professional in the event that you want to talk to someone about this."

"Some kind of head doctor!" Brad said in alarm, "Maybe later."

"OK, there is also someone at work that is familiar with this, not a doctor but just a..." Karen struggled to find the right word, "Just a friend- someone a lot like you."

"I've got a lot to think about, Mom. I'm kind of confused right now."

"I understand, honey, I really do. A couple of weeks ago I was pretty confused myself. Just let me know what I can do to help."

"Thanks..."

Karen rose from the table, "I better get started on dinner, your Dad will be home in a bit."

++++++++++

When Rachael arrived on Wednesday morning, Donna greeted her warmly.

"Hi Rachael. Denise asked me to have you pop into her office when you got in."

"Thanks, Donna. Say, I really like your blouse," Rachael said, admiring the royal blue top with a delicate pattern, "That's beautiful."

"Thanks, I got it at Carpenters. It was on the sale rack," Donna joked.

"I'll head over there right after work," she said with a wink.

Rachael took the short walk to Denise's office and tapped on the open door.

"Hi there, come in and have a seat... Why don't you go ahead and close the door."

Rachael swung the door closed and took a seat across from Denise.

"Did the employee physical yesterday go OK?" Denise asked.

"Yes, I really like the doctor. I also want to thank you for explaining everything to her. Both the staff and the Doctor were very gracious."

"I'm glad that worked out. Now onto other things, Karen been through kind of a tough week but from what I understand things went pretty well with her son." Denise said.

"That's great news," Rachael replied, relieved.

"I think Karen is wanting you to talk to Brad."

"I am willing to but that will be a little bit awkward. I assume that he didn't want to talk with Dr. Woodard."

"He balked at that from what Karen said. She mentioned to him that she had someone at work he could talk to and he was more receptive to that."

"I'm not any kind of a professional, Denise. I just don't want to make some kind of misstep."

"You'll do fine, Rachael."

"I'm wondering if it wouldn't be better to talk on the phone. I have to admit I'm somewhat of an anomaly. I have been very blessed in the way that my family and my co-workers have accepted me. I wouldn't want to give Brad the impression that he is going to have the same experience."

"I'll let Karen know."

"Please give her my number at the apartment. Have him call and ask for Eric."

Over dinner that evening, Rachael warned Chris to expect a call from a someone asking for Eric.

Chris gave a puzzled look.

"One of my co-workers has a son with some gender-identity issues. I told her I would talk to him," Rachael explained.

About eight PM, a call came in which Chris answered.

"Eric," Chris called, "It's for you."

Rachael took a deep breath and picked up the phone.

"This is Eric Jeffreys." Rachael said, hardly recognizing his male voice.

"Hello, this is Bradley Rogers, I'm Karen Rogers' son."

"Hi Brad, Karen mentioned that you might call."

For the next several minutes they talked about a lot of the same things that Eric had already learned from Karen. Brad was very forthcoming and he seemed to be relieved to have someone to talk to.

"Brad, I know that you probably aren't going to believe me when I say this, but I really envy your situation."

"I'm sorry, Mr Jeffreys, but why do you say that."

"Please just call me Eric. The reason I said that is I was deeply closeted for many years before I finally told my wife about my cross- dressing. It seems like such a waste now."

"A waste?"

"Yes, I wasted many years thinking I was some kind of freak, that there was something wrong with me, that I was defective somehow."

"I know how that feels."

"That's why I envy you. Admittedly, your mother is still very confused and you have a long road ahead of you, but at least you have someone you can confide in. I spent years all alone living my life like some kind of secret agent, never able to trust anyone because I didn't even trust myself."

"But my Mom wants to take me to some shrink. I'm not sure how that is going to work out."

"You realize that this is not something that is going to get fixed, don't you? This has been part of you for most of your life and I feel safe in saying that it will remain. You might think that you can make it go away but I know many, many people like us. I haven't known anyone who has been able to escape it yet."

"Then what is the purpose of going to a doctor?"

"So that they can tell you how to cope. This will be good for you but it will also be helpful for the rest of your family. Someone like your mother should be there with you."

"Have you ever been to a counselor?"

"Yes, my wife and I went several times."

Brad was quiet for a bit, having trouble formulating the next question. "You said something about knowing other people... people like us?"

"Yes, I belong to a support group."

"I think I would like to try something like that some time."

"Brad, it will be best to take it one step at a time. Let your family get accustomed to this new situation. Don't try to push into anything before everyone is ready."

"How so?"

"I'll give you an example from my own life. After I told my wife about my dressing, some time later she would allow me to dress up a little bit around the house."

"Wow!"

"Oh, but there's more. She was fine with it when I would wear something like women's slacks and a blouse, but one time I put on a bra and stuffed it with some paper towels and it absolutely freaked her out."

"Why?"

"I can't explain it, but it was the straw that broke the camel's back. I pushed too far and got her out of her comfort zone. It was several days before she would even talk to me about it and much longer than that before she would permit me to dress around her. After that I was much more measured when I added another element to my dressing."

"Oh,"

"I've heard it called the 'kid in a candy store' syndrome. We've lived with this ever since we can remember and are ready to experiment. Just remember this is all very new and scary to others. Please make sure that you are sensitive to how others might react. Nothing can kill the joy of your feminine expression faster than having someone getting all uptight about it."

"How long will it take."

"It depends- all I can tell you is my wife is now comfortable enough that I can now do a complete makeover and she sometimes even gives me suggestions on my outfits and makeup."

"Should I let anyone else know?"

"The best advise that I can give you is if they don't absolutely need to know, you shouldn't tell them."

"Thanks for all of the great advice."

"You're quite welcome."

"Well, Mr. Jeff... Eric, I had probably not take up any more of your time."

"If there is anything else that I can do to help, please have your mother let me know. Something I would suggest- please don't try to do anything behind your mother's back. It's not that she is being mean, but she will be watching you very carefully now. Include her in what you are thinking and doing. If you don't think she wouldn't understand, then you probably shouldn't be doing it."

"I'll try."

"Goodbye Brad."

"Bye, Eric."

Rachael set the phone down and went to the living room. She let out a long exhalation as she sat on the sofa next to Chris.

"How did it go?"

"OK I think. The poor fellow has a lot ahead of him. It is kind of like being in a mine-field, you aren't aware that you've screwed up until you make the wrong step."

"You said that it is a relative of someone you work with?"

"Yes, one of the women in marketing. I have this really strange feeling, I'm afraid that this somehow relates to my going to work at Normacare. At least his mother is trying to do the right things."

"Well, this is what you signed up for with your new job. I bet no one thought that the first beneficiary of your program would be inside the organization."

Rachael laughed, "What a great way to look at it!"

++++++++++

On Friday afternoon, Karen dropped by Rachael's office.

"Got a minute?" she asked.

"Sure, no problem," Rachael replied, turning away from the computer to face her.

Karen secured the door and took a seat. "Brad and I went to see Dr. Woodard this morning."

"How did it go? I hope it was helpful." Rachael replied.

"Yes, very much so. The doctor took quite a bit of time talking to Brad and then she talked to me. She was able to comfort me greatly. Thank you for the excellent referral."

"I'm just glad she could help."

"It relieved me to know that Brad wasn't contemplating surgery or taking drugs or hormones or anything. I had read so many bizarre things that I was really scared," Karen confided.

"The vast number of cross-dressers are heterosexual so it doesn't surprise me that Brad is also. When we talked, I got the sense that everything was going to be all right with him."

"I want to thank you for speaking with Brad, That really helped."

"No problem Karen."

"One of the things that the doctor mentioned was about a support group. What is your feeling about something like that?"

"Personally, I think it is was one of the most meaningful things that I have been involved with. It gave my wife and I someone who we could relate to but provided a degree of security and anonymity at the same time."

"Dr. Woodard gave us the number of a local group. Brad was going to try go get in touch with them and see about coming to a meeting."

"That would be wonderful. Are you planning to go with him?"

"I don't know if I would be comfortable."

"You can suit yourself but please ask Brad. I think it would be very important to him if you would be there."

"I will give it some thought. Rachael, I'm really thankful for all you have done for us."

"I'm just happy that everything is working out so far."

Rachael and Karen visited for quite a while and parted on a positive note.

After Karen left, Rachael went to the employee lounge to get a can of soda. After she had her drink, she noticed Amber sitting at one of the tables.

"Hi, Amber," Rachael said, "can I join you?"

"Sure!" Amber replied, indicating to the chair beside her.

After Rachael had taken the seat, Amber said in a quiet voice, "I noticed Karen Rogers leaving your office a little while ago. Is everything OK?"

"Sure, we were just visiting about something outside of work."

"Has she been trying to stir anything up?" Amber asked.

"No..." Rachael said.

"It's just that, well, she made some troubling comments to Heather about you before you even started work here."

Rachael remembered back to her first day at work. She had sensed some tension in the marketing department and remembered how one of the people had ducked out of the room when she came in. She hadn't put it together until now- it was Karen.

"I'm glad to hear that she isn't trying to make trouble for you. If she did, I'd have to scratch her eyes out and I might mess up my manicure," Amber continued, trying to lighten the mood.

"I think Karen and I are fine now. Thanks for letting me know- I'll be on my guard. Hey, I really like that necklace!" Rachael said, trying to deflect the conversation.

Toward the end of the day, Denise dropped by to see Rachael.

"How is everything going, Rachael? Is everyone getting the information that you need for your project?"

"Yes, take a look at these mock-ups from marketing," Rachael said excitedly as she handed over some items from the desk. "Carmine's team really did a great job! There is a sales-piece, a handout and they are even working on an advertisement for a magazine."

"These look fantastic," Denise beamed, "this looks like it is really coming together."

"I have been getting some great responses from the organizations. They are reserved but also willing to give us a chance to present the program to them."

"Did Harry from legal ever get together with you?" Denise asked.

"Yes, he came by last week. He is working up a privacy policy for our records and communications, and also something to put on the website."

"Website?"

"Yes, I.T. is working with design and marketing to put something up for the program. Carmine is trying to come up with a domain name. I've been racking my mind about what name we could use."

"You have some very good people working with you on this, it sounds like you have come a long way already."

Rachael was quiet for a bit and Denise asked if something was wrong. Rachael rose, closed the door then took a seat on a chair beside Denise.

"I had an interesting conversation with one of the telemarketing people today... about Karen."

Denise shifted in her seat, fearing the topic of the earlier discussion, "Oh..."

"Was there any problem with Karen when I came to work here?" Rachael probed.

"I really can't like to say too much about that, but it seems to have been resolved now anyway."

"I just need to be careful that this thing with her son is not some kind of trap. There are a lot of people who will be hurt if she is working some kind of vendetta."

"Well, I can at least tell you that is not the case. I can reveal that it was during discussions with some of her family about you that she learned that her son secretly cross dressed. This gave her an entirely different perspective."

"That's a relief," Rachael said.

"I think you can also credit yourself on the fact that you didn't quite match any of the stereotypes. As a result of discussions with us, her daughter, the counselor and her son, she has become much less hostile."

Rachael smiled broadly, confusing Denise.

"This is going to sound really strange, but this is something that I have heard for years but I have never experienced it until now." Rachael started. "When I first started going out into public, going out to restaurants and such with the support group, my wife thought we were all crazy. She asked at one of the meetings why going out into public is so important to us."

Denise listened intently, "OK, why?"

"Just to let people know that we are there, that we are not scary, and that all of their preconceptions about us are wrong!"

"Oh, I see." Denise said, "When all Karen knew about cross-dressing was what she saw on television talk shows, it was easy for her to be bigoted. Once her illusion was shattered, she was able to open her mind to other ideas."

"Exactly," Rachael said, "how wonderful for her."

++++++++++

That evening, Rachael and Chris spent some time talking after they finished with dinner. Chris reminded Rachael that there was a transgender conference scheduled to be held that September in Denver.

"Wow, what a great opportunity to introduce the new program from Normacare. I wonder what it would take to get the name of one of the organizers?"

"I think either April or I will be there. I have the name of the dealer coordinator. You would probably want to see about getting put on the program. You'll probably find a link on the website."

"You are the best, Chris, have I ever told you that."

"Yes, but I never tire of hearing it."

They talked for a bit and were interrupted by the telephone.

"Hello," Chris said, picking up the phone.

"Oh, Hello Greg, nice to hear from you!" Rachael's face lit up, assuming it was Chris' old high-school sweetheart.

"This weekend, sure, I think I could get away for a few hours. My room- mate will just have to get along without me."

"Dinner Saturday evening, that sounds great. How about around seven O'Clock."

"That's a great place, should I just meet you there?"

"Fantastic, I'm looking forward to it."

"See you soon, Bye Greg," Chris said, hanging up the phone.

"Well, Well, good thing Dianne is coming up this weekend. You'll have the place to yourself," Rachael joked.

"It's no big deal," Chris said.

"You're right, of course. A guy that's had a fire burning for you since high school..."

"Stop that!"

"Chris, I'm happy for you. You deserve someone special."

"I have special people all around me, April, Dianne, you..."

"You know what I mean. You deserve someone Chris. I hope that it works out. Now, if you need privacy, just leave a note on the door and I will know to get lost."

"You are just awful," Chris said, then with a gleam in her eye added, "What would I put on the note?"

Dianne arrived mid-morning on Saturday with the goal of locating an apartment. Chris, Rachael and her sat at the kitchen table drinking coffee and going through a rental directory.

"Are you going to want to go look at these places by yourself, Dianne?" Rachael asked nervously.

"No, silly, we are both going to be living there, I think we should decide together."

"I just didn't want to embarrass you or cause any trouble. I don't have any guy clothes here, and even if I did I don't know what I would do about the nails and the hair."

"I think Rachael and I should look at the apartments together," Dianne said, her tone indicating that the matter was not open to discussion.

"OK. I just didn't want to create a problem."

"Rachael, this is what you look like, what you wear and who you are right now. If a potential landlord is going to have a problem with that, I would just as soon find out about it right up front."

"She's right, Rachael," Chris added.

"Good enough, where should we try first."

"I kind of like the look of these town-houses off of State avenue," Dianne continued, pointing to a page in the directory.

"I'm ready when you are!" ++++++++++

Saturday afternoon, Brad's father left the house to play a round of golf which left him and his mother alone for a few hours. Karen hoped that she would have some time when Brad and her could talk.

"Hi Mom," Brad said as she entered his room. He was at his desk surfing some music sites on his computer.

"Hi Brad. How are things?" Karen asked, taking a seat on his bed.

"Just great, Mom. I talked to the people at the support group and they would like to have me come to the next meeting."

"When is it?"

"Next Saturday. There is a 10:00 newcomers meeting and then the rest of the day is pretty open."

"Are you planning to go?"

"I'd like to, but I was hoping that I could get you to go with me. Can we get it squared with Dad?"

"Sure, honey. I'll come up with some story if you aren't ready to tell him everything yet."

"I would rather not right now. I hope you understand but I don't know how he's gonna take it."

"I respect that. This can be our secret for right now." Karen smiled. One of the things that Rachael had told her. Brad's sharing his secret was not like he was coming out, he was just dragging her into the closet with him.

"Brad, there is a favor that I would like to ask of you. I hope you will understand."

"Sure," Brad said, not realizing the gravity of his mother next request.

"I would like to have you take the password off of your computer. I don't want us to have any secrets from one another. Would you be willing to do that?"

Brad hesitated a moment, turned to the computer and after several of mouse clicks he announced, "Done!"

It was like a wall had been removed between mother and son. She rose and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "Would you like to show me your things?"

Without hesitation, Brad retrieved his stash from several places around the room. In addition to the items that Karen had found before, he had an unmatched skirt and blouse, several other pairs of panties and more pantyhose. He placed the items on his bed for Karen to inspect.

"You have some really pretty things here, "Karen observed, "What is your favorite?"

Brad pointed to a pair of pink nylon panties with delicate lace around the leg openings. "These are. They are special because they are the first pair that Sandy gave me."

Karen thought about that. The item that Brad had indicated was not necessarily the prettiest there. She assumed it was the fact that they were a gift from his sister that made them meaningful. She looked over some of the other items, "I don't think this skirt will go very well with the blouse."

Brad remained silent.

"Are they about the right size?" Karen asked, inspecting the sizes.

"The skirt is about right, the blouse is a little tight and the sleeves are too short."

"This is a petite, I would think you would need a Misses size."

"You're probably right," Brad said. He looked at his mother and started laughing, "I love you SO much, Mom."

"I love you too, very much."

They hugged for a second and Karen stepped back to look at him.

"I have something for you," Karen announced, wait here. She walked out of the room and came back a short time later carrying a box. "What do you think of this?"

Brad's eyes widened as he lifted the top off of the box. Inside he found a beautiful lavender negligee with matching panties.

"They're beautiful," Brad said, his eyes misting.

"I guessed on the size but I thought you would like the color."

"I love it! Where did you get it?"

"I stopped by the mall last evening. I wanted to get you something special."

Brad lifted the nightgown out of the wrapping and inspected it closely.

"I'd ask that you only wear it in your room. I think it would take too much explaining if your father were to see it."

He placed the item back in the box and turned to Karen. He hugged her tightly and thanked her over and over. It was then Karen knew she had made the right choice.

++++++++++

It had been a very busy weekend for Rachael. Dianne and her found a great townhouse centrally located between Normacare and Dianne's new office. There were two bedrooms with large closets, plus a comfortable living room with a fireplace. It had an attached two-car garage and fell within their budget. The staff were all very nice and there were no issues with getting the lease signed. Dianne was planning to move down the first of next month.

Rachael took off Monday to handle some last minute items with Dianne. April was glad to cover for Rachael at Chris' shop. Monday Evening, Rachael had taken Dianne back to the airport where they returned the rental car. He saw Dianne off, then decided to take a taxi back to Chris' apartment. Rachael felt a little anxious during the cab ride, but everything went smoothly and the gave the driver a good tip for his excellent service.

"Thank you very much, Ma'am," the driver said in a delightful foreign accent.

Rachael was relieved to not find a note on the door to the apartment.

"Hi Chris, I'm back," she called, entering the apartment.

"I'm in here," Chris called from the living room.

"Dianne is on her way back to L.A. I think we have found a very nice apartment."

"That's great news," Chris said.

Rachael filled her in about the location and details of their new home.

"I think I met up with the fellow that 'Eric' talked to on the phone last weeks."

"Oh, you mean Brad. How did you meet him?"

"He came into the shop this afternoon for a fitting."

"Super, did you find something for him?"

"Yes, we had just what he needed in stock. We also had a couple of different under-wire bras that would gave a bit more support for the forms. From what he said, he doesn't have much of a wardrobe yet. He did say something about going to the meeting this weekend."

"His mother talked to me about that. Did she come with him?"

"No, he was alone."

"Was he en femme?"

"No, he still has to get a wig, some shoes and a dress. His mother had suggested that before they shopped for clothes he ought to see about forms so they could better judge the fit."

"That is just super. Thanks for working with him, Chris."

"Not a problem. He's a gem."

They talked for a few more minutes, and Rachael remembered something important that they hadn't discussed.

"How was your date?"

"Oh, it wasn't like a date."

"Lets see, a man and a woman, both single, go out for the evening meal to a nice restaurant. Sounds like a date to me."

Chris smiled, knowing that Rachael had her on that one. "OK, the 'date' went fine. We had a good time catching up on some of the people that we knew from high school. He also talked about his ex-wife and his new job."

"Did you know his ex?" Rachael asked, suspecting the answer.

"Yes, she was one of the reasons that Greg and I stopped seeing one another," Chris answered uncomfortably.

Rachael sensed her unease and changed the subject. "How does he like Denver?"

They continued to discuss the evening, plus Chris mentioned that they had lunch the next day. Everything indicated that the two were getting along quite well and Rachael encouraged her to keep seeing him.

"It's just different is all," Chris said, "I'm so used to doing things on my own. I guess I just hate change."

"I know what that is like. You are a lot like Eric was until he lost his job at the factory and his wife and sister-in-law turned his life upside-down."

Chris smiled, "Maybe I'll give it a try..."

++++++++++

In what has become somewhat routine, Rachael heard a tap on her office door.

"Hi, Karen, come in."

Karen entered the office, closed the door behind her, and settled into one of the chairs.

"How's things thing?" Rachael asked.

"Quite well. I hope I'm not becoming a pest, but I need a bit more advise."

"Sure, what can I help with?"

"Brad and I are planning to go to a support group meeting next weekend. I just didn't know quite how to approach that."

"Are you planning to go to the newcomers meeting?" Rachael asked.

"Yes, so that leads me to my question. I don't quite know how to ask this, what kind of clothing will be appropriate?"

"Karen, if your question is if Brad will have to dressed as a girl, the answer is no."

"That's part of the problem, Brad doesn't have much of a wardrobe yet and I am trying to discourage him from sharing my clothes."

"Don't be concerned about establishing rules like that. If you feel uncomfortable with something, tell him. Not sharing clothing is a common boundary."

"I'm not sure how to go about getting a wardrobe for him."

"If you would like my recommendation, I would say for Brad to attend the newcomers meeting 'Bubba,' that is to say in his regular male clothes. There he can ask the other members for recommendations on where to shop. They will know wig stylists, shoe stores, salons and make-up counters where you can get whatever he needs. They will probably be more than willing to go with you and Brad."

"I don't want to be an imposition."

"This is shopping, Karen. Believe me they will love the opportunity."

"If you think it will be OK, that sounds like a great idea. I have told a little white lie to his father and we are planning on staying at the hotel that weekend."

"Just take along the things that Brad already has and maybe a spare suitcase to bring home his new items. The 'ladies' will probably be able to make good suggestions on where to shop to get what he needs. Is he planning on going out Saturday night for dinner?"

"Yes, he is really looking forward to it."

"Are you planning to go too? You know you will be quite welcome."

"I'm not sure, I don't know what I would do if I saw someone that I knew."

"You might consider what some of the other wives do. They will wear a little disguise of their own. Maybe a wig and dark glasses, wear a different style of clothing, change your makeup, something that would keep you from being recognized."

"That's an interesting idea, I'll consider that."

"I know that your son will really want you to be there."

"That is what he is telling me. Thanks again for everything you have done."

"No problem, Karen, anytime. I do have one other question for you," Rachael started, "I was planning on being at the meeting this weekend myself. Would you prefer that I not be there?"

Karen looked at Rachael in shock, "Whatever would make you think that? Knowing that you will be there makes me feel much better. Please don't make other plans on my account."

"I know this is going to be a very high-energy weekend for you and didn't want to add any additional stress."

"Not at all," Karen rose and gave Rachael a hug, "that will be perfect."

After Karen left her office, Rachael was pleased to see a message from the Denver GLBT conference coordinator in her e-mail inbox.

"Wow, that was quick," Rachael said to herself. Going through the note, she saw that they were very interested in the program Rachael had suggested. Gail, the coordinator, was requesting additional information and provided a mailing address and telephone number. Rachael printed out some color copies of the materials she had received from marketing and a presentation proposal that she had worked up. She stuffed all of the information into a large envelope, added several of her business cards and took the package to the mail-room. She was simultaneously excited and anxious about the prospect of giving the presentation.

++++++++++

Karen and Brad entered the hotel Friday evening. They checked in and found their way to their large and comfortable room. There was a bathroom with a large mirror and good lighting, a large closet, and two queen beds. Brad and his mother emptied their suitcases into the chest under the television, dividing the drawers between them. Karen noticed that Brad had packed very light and that the only male clothes he had were the slacks and dress shirt he was wearing.

Karen took her makeup case into the bathroom and began to arrange her cosmetics on the large vanity surface. She looked back to see Brad watching her intently.

"Brad, have you ever used makeup?" Karen asked.

"Just once, Sandy made me up one time."

Karen continued to pull things out of her case, "This is concealer, I use it to cover any marks or blemishes, whatever my regular foundation won't cover properly..."

Karen continued to describe the items as she took them out of the case and placed them on a towel on top of the vanity. Brad was quite interested in the eye-lash curler and some of the other items that she carried with her.

"I probably brought more than I usually would, but I didn't know what me might need so I brought it all," she explained, causing Brad to smile.

"Do you shave your legs?" she asked.

"No..."

"Well, if you are planning on wearing a dress or a skirt tomorrow, you probably should. Here," Karen said, handing Brad a pink razor and a can of shaving foam, "take a bath and shave your legs and underarms. Do you think you need any help?"

Brad gulped said that he thought he would be OK.

She handed him another colorful package, "Here are some bath-salts, it will make the bath water smell nice. Let me know before you get out and I can make sure you got everything on the back of your legs."

Brad stood rigid, hardly believing this was happening to him.

"I'll let you have some privacy. I'm going to go out and watch TV. Let me know if you need anything," Karen said as she left the room.

After she closed the door, she let out a long exhalation. Was she doing the right thing? She thought back to the discussion with Dr. Woodard. It was her suggestion that she try to assist Brad, if for no better reason than to prevent a wedge from being driven between them. She didn't understand, nor did she think she could ever understand, what Brad was going through. If she had the opportunity to help him, to do this with him and to be there for him, then it had to be right.

She pulled out the drawer where she had seen Brad put his night-gown. She picked up the gown and the matching panties and set them on the bed. She retrieved her nightgown also. Although she usually would usually wear cotton pajamas, tonight was special so she brought along her nightgown as well. The thought of how it would look on her made her feel more feminine than she had in years.

"Mom," the call came from the bathroom.

"Coming honey," Karen said, picking up Brad's nightgown and heading toward the door.

"How are you doing?" she asked, opening the door slightly.

"I think I'm about done."

Karen entered the room and set the nightgown on the vanity. "Stand up and turn around. Let me check the back of you," Karen said.

As Brad stood and turned, Karen noticed that he had done a very good job with the shaving. There was only a couple of small nicks.

"There's just a little bit here," Karen announced, picking up the razor and foam. She lathered the area and in less than a minute said everything looked good.

"You probably should wash your hair, Honey. I'll hang up these clothes and after you get dried off you can put on your nightgown," Karen picked up the shirt, slacks, and underwear hanging on the hook behind the door.

"Thanks Mom," Brad said, almost choking from emotion.

Karen left the small room and hung Brad's male clothes in the closet.

After a few minutes, Brad opened the door and stood dressed in his nightgown. He had draped a towel over his wet hair in a boyish fashion.

"Here, honey, do your hair like this," she said, showing the youngster how to wrap his hair in a turban. Karen looked lovingly at her son. "That looks really nice, Br..., hummm, I can't be calling you that when you look this nice. What should we call you?"

"Can we use the name Brenda, mother?"

"Yes... Brenda... I like that. You look really nice Brenda. Let's blow- dry your hair and then I need to get ready for bed. It's getting late and we have a big day tomorrow."

The phone rang early the next morning with the automated voice announcing to Karen that it was seven AM. She moved from the bed and turned on the small light on the nightstand. She regarded herself in the mirror, dressed in her brilliant blue nightgown, she felt marvelous. She glanced toward the other bed.

"Good morning, Mom."

"Good morning... Brenda," she said, pleased she remembered to use the special name, "How did you sleep?"

Brenda appeared to hug herself and said, "Wonderfully. I feel so fantastic."

"Well, you can rest there for a bit and I'll take a shower and get ready. Then we can go down and get breakfast."

"Mom..." came a tentative voice.

"Yes?"

"When you put on your makeup, can I watch?"

Karen hesitated. There were a million things going through her mind. Was she up to this... could she keep it together... was she being too accommodating. She looked deeply into her son's eyes and could see the sincerity in the request. She thought back to when Sandra was young and made similar requests of her. Why is it so difficult just because it was her son asking? She could sense the anxiety that her delayed response was causing.

"Sure honey, I'll let you know when I'm through with my shower. Do you have to use the bathroom?"

"Yes, Mom."

"Go ahead while I get my clothes picked out."

After Brenda emerged from the bathroom, Karen picked up her clothes for the day, went into the bathroom, and closed the door behind her. She noticed that the toilet seat was left down. The thought occurred to her- maybe Brenda would sit down rather then standing. When wearing the nightgown, it would certainly be easier that way. Thinking about it led her to smile.

After she completed her shower and dried her hair, Karen got dressed. Just before she started to do her makeup, she opened the door and looked around the corner. It was Brad. He had taken off his nightgown and wore the only male clothing in the room.

"I'm about to start my makeup now," she announced, causing Brad come and join her.

"The first thing that I do is use a moisturizer to give a good base for the foundation..."

++++++++++

About nine-thirty, Rachael walked into the room that the ladies use for the meetings. She immediately spotted Roxanne as well as some of the others that she met a couple of months before.

"Hi Rachael," Roxanne called, giving her a hug, "Do you remember Annette and Crystal?"

"Yes, I believe we met at the last meeting but I'm so terrible with names."

"Nice to see you again," Annette said. Crystal welcomed Rachael back.

"Did Roxanne say you were thinking about becoming a member?" Annette asked.

"Yes, we will be relocating to Denver permanently, so it would be a privilege for me to become a part of your group."

"The board has your application and I really don't think there will be any kind of a problem. I think we also might have a couple of newcomers today." Roxanne announced.

"Great," Crystal said.

"One of the new people is in his forties and recently divorced. The other is a teen-ager, and. I think his mother might come with him."

"A teen, that would be wonderful. I just wish I had all of the years of closeted dressing back," Annette said.

Roxanne looked at Rachael and acted like she was going to add something, but then hesitated. Rachael was glad that nothing was said about Rachael and Karen working together.

Just about that time, Danielle entered the room wearing a beautiful patterned dress with red high-heel shoes and matching bag. She stopped to gave Rachael a big hug.

"You look fantastic, Danielle," Rachael said, admiring her outfit.

"You look pretty nice yourself." Danielle responded, examining Rachael's brilliant turquoise blouse with coordinating skirt.

Another lady entered the room and Roxanne left to talk to her. Roxanne introduced herself and the lady responded that her name was Ginger. Rachael assumed it was one of the newcomers. Then, a few minutes before ten, Rachael noticed a young man enter the room followed closely by Karen. Roxanne introduced herself and thanked them for coming to the meeting. There were about 15 ladies and their spouses in the room at that point and Roxanne set about the task of introducing the newcomers to the members and their spouses. When Roxanne got to Rachael, she introduced Ginger, and then Brenda and Karen. Rachael said hello, commenting that she was still pretty new to the group herself as it was only her second meeting.

Karen looked a bit confused, but Rachael gave her a wink. Ginger and Brenda were talking to one of the other ladies and moved toward the other side of the room. Karen stayed behind to talk to Rachael.

"Is anything wrong?" Karen asked.

"Not at all. One thing I'll mention about these meetings. The ladies avoid using their real first names and they will never discuss their work or other personal details. This is the reason that Roxanne introduced your son as Brenda even though he is in male clothes..

"Oh, I wondered," Karen said.

"I didn't want to act like I knew you because then someone might connect us as knowing each other outside of the group. Most of the people here have jobs or family situations that could be a problem if they get outed. Some are school teachers, professionals, airline pilots, there are even professional athletes. They could be ruined if word got out so everyone here is very respectful of privacy."

"That's very comforting, thanks for letting me know."

"It looks like the newcomers meeting is about to start. Let's find a seat!"

The newcomers, Roxanne, about 6 of the ladies and some of the wives took seats for the meeting.

Since anything said at the meeting is kept in strict confidence, we won't talk too much about it except to say that Ginger, Brenda and Karen all found the content of the meeting valuable.

"What did you think?" Rachael asked Brenda as they left the meeting.

"I feel much better knowing that I am not weird. All of the other's stories were so similar to what I feel. What did you think, Mom."

"I can't describe how relieved I am. To hear the other wives express the same reservations that I feel and to see how they have been able to adapt."

"Most of the wives still have problems, they never go away, or maybe they just get replaced with new ones," Rachael said.

"I've been going through many of those same feelings," Karen admitted.

"It is amazing the way gender identity is pounded into us from the earliest age. From painting the nursery pink or blue, to sensitive boys being called sissies or being told 'big boys don't cry' and all the rest. We are continually patterned to think in terms of male and female. It is a big challenge to try to undo some of those biases for those of us who don't comfortably fit in the mold," Rachael concluded.

As they talked, Danielle walked up to join them.

"Brenda, are you planning to join us for dinner this evening?" Danielle asked.

"I would like to, but I... um...well I..."

"Do you need help with an outfit?" Danielle asked.

"Yes, I'm not sure how to get what I need."

"That's easy. Do you have a wig?" she asked.

"No."

"OK, first thing we go over to Tres-Tress. Then we'll drop by Sylvia's consignment shop. She is up on the north side. She has a great eye for fashion and she is very willing to help."

"Sounds Great," Brenda said.

"Shoes?"

"All I have with me are these." Brenda said, pointing to the male loafers.

"Alright, on the way to Sylvia's, we'll stop by a great place I know. How about foundation garments?"

"Brenda has forms and underwear, we might need a slip depending on what kind of dress we end up with," Karen added.

"No problem, I'll take my cosmetics case and we'll do some makeup at Sylvia's. From there we'll go over to Fashion Statement and one of the pros will be able to show you some makeup tricks and help you with colors. We'll have a blast, you'll see."

"Is that going to be OK, Mom?" Brenda asked.

"Sounds like fun, can I come along?" Karen replied, causing a wide smile to appear on Brenda's face.

"The more the merrier, how about you Rachael?" Danielle asked.

"Well..." Rachael hesitated.

"Please!" Brenda remarked. Rachael looked at Karen and she nodded her approval.

"Count me in! I'll drive."

++++++++++

After the shopping trip, Karen and Brenda stopped back at their room to freshen up for dinner.

"I've had a great day, Mom," Brenda said.

"I haven't been to so many stores in one day in years," Karen joked.

"I just love this outfit," Brenda said. She twirled in front of the mirror to look at her ivory eyelet blouse and the coordinating blue skirt. She was wearing tan pantyhose and a low-heel pump. The matching bag sat on the chair nearby. Brenda's forms gave her a great shape and the outfit was complemented by a gold necklace and clip ear-rings that she borrowed from Danielle.

"I can't get over how pretty you look, Brenda," Karen said softly.

Brenda's eyes misted, "That is so wonderful to hear, Mom, thanks for being there with me."

"It was my pleasure, honey. Well, you look super, but I need to do a little bit more with my makeup so that I can compete with my new daughter," Karen said, giving Brenda a wink.

Karen retreated into the bathroom, closing the door. After some personal care, she started thinking about all of the things that they had shown Brenda over at Fashion Statement. She started to work on her makeup, but paused to look toward the closed door. She edged the door open in the event Brenda would want to come in and watch her get ready.

She looked over her skin and was pleased with the color of her foundation. She remembered the dramatic effect when they profiled under Brenda's cheeks to accentuate the cheekbone. Looked through her things and found a dark brown eye pencil. She drew a few lines under her cheekbones, then smudged them with her fingertips like they showed Brenda. The effect was striking. She used the same pencil to deepen her eye sockets, and then added a bit of glitter eye shadow. She usually didn't use an eye-liner, but she sharpened the dark pencil to a point and then outlined her eyes. She saw a movement out of the corner of her eye and turned to find Brenda watching her.

"I really like the look, Mom."

"So do I," Karen said, "I'm trying some of the things that Gwen showed you this afternoon.

"She was a lot of fun. You should go over there some time yourself," Brenda said.

"I have been thinking about that. Since this is evening, what about a little darker lipstick. Do you like this color?" Karen asked, rolling a dark red lipstick out of the holder.

"I like that. Are you going to use a liner?" Brenda asked.

"I don't think I have anything like that."

"You could use the one I got from Gwen. It's in my purse."

Karen hesitated, a strange sense of unease coming over her.

"No, honey, thank you. I think I have a lip brush in here somewhere. I try to use that." She dug through her makeup case and located a suitable brush, "This should work..." Karen inwardly winced at what she had just done. There was never a problem sharing makeup with Sandy, what made Brenda's offer any different.

Karen's new daughter watched as her mother transferred the color from her lipstick to the brush, and then applied it carefully to her lips. When she was satisfied, she blotted her lips with a tissue.

"Wow, that looks great!" Brenda said.

"Yes, I agree. Now I'm almost as pretty as you are."

The ladies had dinner with the rest of the group at a very nice restaurant. The staff was very polite, referring to all of the diners as Ma'am and providing excellent service. Everyone was very complementary about Brenda's new outfit and makeup. It was Rachael that noticed the change in Karen's look.

"I really like what you did with your makeup, Karen. That looks really nice."

"I picked up some tips at Fashion Statement this afternoon. I thought I would do a little experimenting," Karen replied.

"You look great," Rachael repeated, much to Karen's appreciation.

After dinner, the ladies were talking about going to the bar at the hotel, but since Brenda was underage she would not be able to go along.

"We've had a pretty long day as it is," Karen explained, "I think we'll head back to the room."

"Are you going to be able to come back next month?" Roxanne asked Brenda.

"I would like to."

"I'll send some information with you. We hope to see you also, Karen."

"I'll see what I can do. I want to let everyone know how much Brenda and I have enjoyed ourselves," Karen said.

"Well, we've certainly enjoyed having you."

A very tired Karen and Brenda made the short journey back to their room and let themselves in. They settled on the sofa and talked about all of the activities of the day.

"I really enjoyed myself, Mom," Brenda said, stifling a yawn, "but I'm starting to get a little tired."

"You've had a big day, honey."

"Mom, I know that I have to go back to being a boy tomorrow, but can I wear my nightgown again tonight?"

"Sure, Brenda. I'll show you what to do to take off your makeup and we'll both get ready for bed. I've had kind of a long day myself."

Karen awoke the next morning to the sound of Brenda taking clothing out of the closet before heading to the bathroom. A few minutes later, Brad exited the small room, opened his suitcase and and placed the nightgown inside. Karen sat up in bed and Brad came over and give her a hug.

"Good morning," he said.

"Good morning, Brad," she replied, reaching to the nightstand to turn on the lamp. They sat for a bit, Brad delicately holding her hand and allowing Karen a couple of minutes to wake.

"Can we talk for a bit?" Karen started.

"Sure... I'm not in any hurry," Brad replied, squeezing her hand.

Karen was silent for a moment, struggling to start the conversation that she knew they had to have.

"You're worried about Brenda, aren't you?" Brad said.

"Not worried so much, but this has been a very big adjustment for me. It's going to take me some time."

"Mom, I want to let you know, I appreciate what you went through this weekend. I must have put you through... well... I know that you went through a lot."

"I just want to let you know, I'm sure glad it turned out this way," Karen said.

The comment puzzled Brad, "Why?"

"Because if I would have learned about Brenda a month ago, I'm afraid I would have acted much differently."

"No you wouldn't have!"

"Yes, honey," Karen said with a sniff, "I'm afraid so. Remember what Rachael said about people who couldn't understand those who didn't fit the gender stereotype. Well, I'm afraid that I was one of those people. Men were men and women, women- everything else had to be wrong, or sinful, or perverted.

A tear formed in Brad's eye and he said that he didn't think his mother could ever be like that.

"I'm afraid so," Karen admitted.

"What changed your mind?" Brad asked.

"Well, I met someone just like Brenda. Not scary, not perverted, just someone wired a little differently. Someone who everyone liked and accepted because they were who they were made to be."

"Who was it?"

"It was Eric, the person you talked to on the phone."

"He's neat!"

"Well, that's what I think now, but before we met I said some very hateful things about Eric that I deeply regret."

"I'm sure he'll forgive you."

"You know, I think you're right. And that is why he, or maybe I should say she, is so special."

"I wanted to let you know something that Eric and I discussed," Brad explained.

"OK," Karen said.

"He told me that I should be very careful that I don't do anything that is going to make you uncomfortable. I have been giving that a lot of thought."

"I'm doing OK."

"Its just that I have sensed a couple of times this weekend that I might have said something that made you uneasy."

"I'm just adapting is all."

"Well, I realize that I have to go back to being a boy, to being Brad. I'm willing to do that as long as I know it will be OK to be Brenda every now and then."

"I'm hoping that you aren't talking about wearing panties to school or anything like that!"

"No, Mom, this weekend has given me some time to be Brenda, now I'm ready to go back to being your son Brad."

"Sounds OK so far."

"Do you think we'll be able to come back to the meeting next month?"

"I hate lying to your father like we did."

"Is it time to share our secret with him?" Brad asked, nervously.

"Can you give me some time to think about that. Whatever we do, I'll try to arrange it so you can be here next month."

"That would be great, but I'm hoping you could come too."

"Actually, I was thinking about asking your sister. Would that work?"

"Do you think she would do it?"

"We'll never know unless we ask. I'll see her next week, would you want me to mention it to her?"

"Yeah!" Brad said, his face brightening.

"Now, what about me getting dressed so we can have some breakfast," Karen said, reaching over to give her son a kiss on the forehead.

++++++++++

Monday morning rolled around with Chris silencing the alarm clock as usual.

"Good morning," she called to Rachael.

"Good morning, sis," Rachael replied. Ready for our morning workout?

"Yes," Chris responded, "By the way, Rachael, I was wondering if you have weighed yourself recently."

"I did yesterday. I'm down about 15 pounds," Rachael replied proudly.

"I thought so, I have lost about 10 pounds myself. I could tell because my clothes were getting loose."

"Sounds like an excuse for more shopping!" Rachael said, enthusiastically.

"You're impossible. Up you go so we can try to get you down 20 pounds."

After their brisk exercise session, they sat down for a healthy breakfast.

"I talked to Dianne last evening," Rachael said, "She says the movers will be in next week to pack up."

"Wow, I've lost track of the time," Chris said, "Rachael, I've been going to ask..."

"Yes," Rachael said, prodding Chris along.

"How are you guys going to work that, I mean you as Rachel and all?"

"She really wants me to move back into the apartment and be with her. We've discussed it at length and she is still very sensitive to the whole female persona thing. When we were looking for a place to live, she insisted on somewhere with two bedrooms. Rachael's things are going in the second bedroom."

"OK, what about when you sleep together?" Chris asked.

"She's gotten used to the curly hair and the nails, so as long as I pretend to be Eric she is OK."

"Kind of like three people living in the apartment. Whatever works for you guys," Chris said with a laugh.

Rachael became serious, voice cracking with emotion, "Chris, I need to explain something. You and Dianne are the best things that have ever happened to me. I would walk five miles barefoot across broken glass to please either one of you. Whatever I need to do to make Dianne comfortable I will do without hesitation. To her credit, she realizes just how much Rachael is a part of me and she is willing to compromise. I am more than willing to meet her half way."

Chris' eyes welled up in tears, "That is such a beautiful sentiment."

"I meant every word," Rachael said.

"I know- that's what made it so beautiful," Chris replied, reaching over to give Rachael a huge hug.

Dianne called Rachael midweek to let her know that the movers had finished packing and that everything was going into the moving van the next morning.

"I'm going to be staying in a motel through the weekend, and they have us scheduled for delivery Monday afternoon."

"Should I take Monday off?" Rachael asked.

"I'll drive up to meet the movers on Monday, you can just drop by after work," Dianne offered.

"Won't you need help?"

"They will be bringing everything up to the apartment. When you get home we will get it all put away."

"Super, I'm looking forward to seeing you next week."

++++++++++

Sandy was in for a bit of a surprise on Thursday evening. Rather than just her mother, she would be having dinner with her brother also.

"Hello, little brother," Sandy said.

Brad looked at her lovingly, then gave her a big hug.

They all passed through the buffet line, got their meals then found a quiet place to sit. The three discussed their past week at school and work, then grew quiet as they finished dinner.

Brad looked at his sister and smiled, "Sis, the most wonderful thing happened to me."

Sandra looked puzzled and asked, "What's that?"

"Mother found out about Brenda."

Sandy shifted uncomfortably, "Oh."

"You remember how you, Tina and Brenda went out to the movies, and how Brenda had such a great time?"

"Yes..."

"Well, Mom, Brenda and a whole lot of our new friends went out together last weekend."

"Whoa, brother, let me get caught up here," Sandy said as Karen burst out in laughter.

Karen related the details of the last weekend as Sandy sat in shocked silence.

"Mom, you went out to dinner with Brenda, and... and a lot of other people like her?" Sandy said in astonishment.

"There were other... how do I put this... G-Gs," Karen said, using the term that she had learned that weekend.

"G-Gs?" Sandy asked.

"Genetic girls..." Karen said with a smile.

"Oh," Sandy said, still trying to come to grips with the new situation.

For the next half hour, Karen patiently explained all of the events of the past couple of weeks- Brad talking to Eric, the trip to Dr. Woodard, Brad's call to the support group, everything.

"A transgender support group, I didn't even know something like that even existed."

Brad became pensive, and then looked to Sandra, "Sis, I'd like to ask you a huge favor."

Sandy grabbed his hand, "What is it Brad?"

"Next month, would you go with me to the meeting?"

Sandra's face was unreadable as she attempted to formulate an answer.

"If you can't, or don't want to, I'll understand."

"Brad, it's just that I don't know what I would need to say... or do."

"You don't have to say or do anything, just be there with me and tell me you love me every now an then."

Sandy's face softened, "Sure, Brad, I'd love to come and meet your new friends."

++++++++++

Rachael arrived at her and Dianne's new apartment after work that next Monday. Dianne was in the kitchen unloading boxes and singing with the radio.

"Hello..." Rachael called.

"Hi Rach, I'm in here," she called.

Rachael looked around the corner to see cabinets full of dishes and the floor littered with a lot of empty boxes.

"Need any help?" Rachael asked.

"I'm about done in here, there is a box in the bathroom that you can start on."

Rachael and Dianne worked until late in the evening transferring the items from the boxes into their new home. As the hour got late, there was just a small number of boxes left in the center of living room.

"Dianne..." Rachael asked, "I'm not seeing something here."

"What's that? I think everything got moved," Dianne replied, looking over the list she had received from the moving company.

"There were some boxes of clothes, the ones in the basement."

"Oh, those old things!"

"Those were the only clothes Eric still had."

"Well, I talked to Chris and she said that you had lost so much weight that she doubted they would even fit anymore. I donated the whole bunch rather than having to mess around moving them."

"What?!?" Rachael said in alarm.

"Did you really need them?" she asked with a coquettish smirk.

"You are just a devil!"

"Did you make my bed yet?" Karen asked, faking a yawn, "I'm getting kind of tired."

"Yes, the bed is all made up."

"Rachael, you look tired. How about you go to your room and then send Eric back to my bedroom to see me."



--- The end---

A Different Perspective

by Holly Hill