Company Barbecue
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I idly fanned the flames over the grill, making sure the gusts that
came by every so often didn't leave me with a half-lit charcoal pit.
"You see the Warriors game, Elliot?" Evan. I'm technically his boss,
but we do equal work. I've just been on the team longer. He's gonna
be promoted soon. He was sitting in a lawn chair watching me work my
barbecue magic.
"What, are you kidding me?" I answered, "They killed the #1 Mavs. Had
to be the biggest upset in Playoff history. You think I'd miss it?"
"Well you missed the finals last year, if I remember correctly,"
Andrew. He's sales. Me and Evan are tech, but he seems to spend more
time around us than the rest of the sales people. He was leaning over
the other side of the grill, watching the coals intently. "D-Wade was
insane, possibly the best performance of the decade, and you missed it,
why?"
"Oh, I see," they keep ribbing me about that one, "so it's my fault I
was in Italy for the entire month of June for my sister's wedding."
"You didn't have to stay the whole month," Evan countered, "I think you
were just avoiding the series."
"Yeah, avoiding the series. Nothing to do with the fact that I'd never
met my brother-in-law, or his family, and I'd barely seen Carol since
she'd moved over there." I felt like I needed to screw something new up
so they'd change topics once in a while. This was starting to become
rote, "I was afraid of a basketball game. Makes sense."
"It does, though. You're afraid of a lot of things." Ugh. Careful
what you wish for. Evan turned to Andrew. "You should have seen him
yesterday in the break room. He opens the door to the john, and this
grasshopper the size of a rat crawls out. Elliot here is standing on
the table crying for his mommy."
"You saw that?" Great. I guess I know what the new topic is.
"So it's true?" Andrew asked.
"I didn't jump on the table, and I didn't scream."
"But a bug did scare the piss out of you, right?"
"Hey, that thing was--"
"Guys, what's up with our food?" Iris, from over by the pool, in the
middle of a cluster that held most of the guests. Head of Human
Resources. It was her idea to have this office barbecue. My idea to
host it. My folks moved down to Florida, and with Carol in Italy, I
ended up with the old house. The one with the huge patio and half-acre
backyard.
I checked the grill. "The coals just settled down," I called back, "I
just need to grease the grating a little, and then the burgers and
kebabs can go on."
I was just about to get to that, but as I was stepping away from the
grill, someone opened the back door, and my dog ran out. Right at me.
Straight between my legs. He always does this.
"Bowser, no. Back inside, now!" I don't know why he does this. I
guess it's some sort of possessive thing, like showing everyone that I
belong to him, but ever since he was a puppy, he's had this habit of
standing between my legs and wagging his tail. It was cute, until he
started growing. Now, not only does it look awkward as hell, but his
tail is high enough to reach my ass, and it feels weird, too. If I
move, he moves with me. It's really weird. Bowser's well-trained, and
he always obeys my commands, but this is the one exception. All I can
do when he decides to "claim" me is wait him out. Usually, he stops
after a few minutes.
"Bowser?" Evan asked. "You named your dog Bowser? What kind of name
is that?"
The grasshopper story was going to have plenty of company, I realized.
"I name pets based on whatever video game I'm into when I buy them."
"Why didn't you name him Mario?" Andrew asked.
I readjusted myself over my dog. "What, you're serious? You think
Mario wasn't already taken? Mario started the whole tradition off.
Fifth birthday; I got a Nintendo, and a puppy, and I couldn't very well
name the puppy Duck Hunt, could I?"
Evan started laughing, and Andrew joined him. "Wait, wait," Evan said,
"what breed, exactly, was Mario?"
"German Shepherd."
They both cracked up, and they started to draw the attention of the
group over by the pool. Great.
"So what other names do your pets have?" Evan asked.
"Well," I pointed over to the makeshift turtle pond just beyond the
patio, "in the turtle pit, I've got Shenmue, Master Chief, and Kasumi,
my box turtles. And I just put a koi in there last week, named...
um..."
"Named?" prodded Evan.
"Well..." I turned my head away a little, "it's named Mii."
They doubled over again, and I heard from behind me, "What, like that
new Nintendo thing?" I twisted around. Great. Everyone had come over
to listen. And watch. And laugh. This was going to be the entire
office's conversation piece for all of next wiik. I mean week.
As I turned back straight, though, I noticed something didn't feel
right. Bowser's tail didn't feel like it was hitting me in the ass
anymore. It felt more like it was pulling at both legs at the same
time. I glanced down and saw, to my surprise, that there was now a
simple, blue cotton A-line skirt tenting over Bowser's back.
I knew better. I knew better than to try to get away from Bowser when
he's stuck to me like this. But I was a bit freaked out. I grabbed
him by the collar, and pulled him backwards as I stepped forwards, and
tried to make my way back inside. He caught up with me before I'd
taken two steps, and almost made me trip. In a skirt. In front of all
my coworkers.
They were all laughing, and my face went pale. They were probably
laughing because of the skirt. I was sure they were laughing about the
skirt. But I knew there was another reason they were laughing. I
could feel Bowser's tail against my ass again, but I could also feel
his fur against my legs. His tail had gotten inside the skirt. I
could only imagine what it looked like from the other angle.
Now, I'm sure Evan made some wise-ass remark, and I'm sure Andrew made
some follow-up, and a couple other people probably chimed in, too. But
I wasn't paying attention. I was too busy being worried because, even
worse than my dog refusing to budge from between my legs, even worse
than having his tail up a skirt I shouldn't be wearing, even worse than
that tail rubbing and patting my ass in front of the entire office... I
was getting turned on.
It wouldn't have been so bad if maybe I could reason that it was a
stress reaction, or that maybe the skirt itself was what my
subconscious felt was erotic, but I knew precisely what was giving me
these feelings. It was Bowser's tail playing patty-cake with my tush.
I was going flush, and the skirt was starting to form a lump in front,
and all in front of my guests. And it was because of my dog! At the
very least, almost everyone was looking at my back, so they couldn't
see my face, or my growing manhood.
I perked up my head and squeaked out "Bowser gets in these moods
sometimes, and I can never get away from him when he does this. Sorry,
guys."
"Don't worry, El," Andrew said, "me and Evan will take care of things."
He nudged Evan, "Right, Evan?"
"Yeah," Evan provided, "the two of us'll take care of things until your
ass decides to stay in one part of your body." Another round of
laughs.
Thankfully, though, I could trust those two. Evan went inside for the
food, and Andrew probably prepped the grill a bit, but I wasn't about
to turn around to look at him. My only chance with Bowser was to not
move too much and wait for him to get bored. My hopes were dashed,
however, when Evan loudly came back out the back door with a platterful
of grillables.
"Whee," he called as he made a little show of himself, moving the
platter, spinning a bit, almost tripping on the steps, and overall
trying to work the crowd. Well, he worked the dog. Bowser rushed out
towards Evan just far enough to realize that he'd left me, and quickly
turned back around and went back through my legs. But now he was
backwards. His tail was right in front of me, and his snout was
pointing back out at the guests. I thought maybe from this angle, I
could manage an escape, but even backwards, Bowser matched me move for
move, and I ended up just working his tail back inside the skirt. I
tried to bend down and grab his tail out, but I couldn't get a grip.
It wasn't until I stood back up that I realized my bigger problem.
Bowser's tail was now whapping directly into my crotch. And I couldn't
feel a dick getting in the way. In fact, it felt like my boxers had
turned into... into panties! I tried to calm myself down and think
logically, but the feeling the tail was giving me in my front was even
more intense than what it had been giving me in the back. On the
bright side, I figured, at least nobody would be able to tell that I
was turned on just from looking, like last time.
I could hear pieces of conversations behind me. Most of them were
about me.
"Can you believe that dog?"
I knew that I couldn't believe it. His tail kept bumping into my flat
crotch, simultaneously expanding the lump in the pit of my stomach that
was forming at the continued realization that I no longer had a penis,
and also sending through my whole body sparks of feelings I'd never
been able to imagine before...
"If I were El, I'd leash the mutt."
Even if I believed in leashes, I really couldn't do anything at this
point. Even if I got away from Bowser, I was still wearing a skirt for
some reason, and my dick is still gone. I thought it was strange that
nobody was talking about the skirt.
"Why's El just standing still like that?"
Why was everyone calling me "El?" I've never gone by that name before.
It's always been "Elliot."
"You're crazy, McCain is the only one in the running with any foreign
policy experience at all!"
Well, at least some people were having conversations that weren't about
me. Just then, Bowser's tail somehow made it inside one of the legs of
the panties. It got caught between the elastic and my thigh and I
could feel Bowser waving it even more furiously. I felt so violated,
so ashamed, and it felt like all his effort was just getting his tail
pushed even further up the panties, closer and closer to the slit that
shouldn't be.
"I saw his face. It looks like that dog of his is satisfying him
better than Andrew ever could."
Wait, what? I couldn't have heard that right. I must have been
distracted by the weird feelings. But they were getting weirder.
Slowly, almost without my noticing, the feeling of violation shifted to
a feeling of being teased. If only Bowser's tail was more substantial.
If only it was more rigid. And more controlled. And less hairy. And
pumping in and out of me like... no! I couldn't be thinking like this.
I could feel sweat start to build up on my brow, I knew my breathing
was ragged, and I couldn't help but notice the multitude of eyes locked
on me. And then Andrew saved me.
Sort of.
"Here, boy," he called, and gave a little whistle. And I could feel
Bowser pulling away. As his tail finally freed itself from the
panties, it apparently managed to rub on just the right spot, and I
found myself over the edge. I could feel the tail push up the back of
the skirt, probably showing off my new underwear, but I didn't care.
My whole body was a giant erogenous zone. I tried to turn around, but
my legs failed me and I tripped, missed the handrail, rolled down the
patio steps, and ended up on my side in waist-deep turtle water.
Andrew ran down the steps, with Evan close behind, "I'm sorry about
that, are you OK?" Andrew asked.
"Yeah," added Evan, "we figured tossing something from the grill might
get Bowser's attention."
They each offered me a hand and pulled me up so I was standing,
completely soaked. My polo had turned into a knit sweater, and it kept
on dripping. Well, at least the water had managed to cool off my jets.
I wasn't turned on anymore. I looked down around me quickly.
"What are you doing, Ellie?" Andrew asked.
"Making sure I didn't crush anyone..." I pointed with my finger,
"there's Mii, and Master Chief and Kasumi are over there, and Shenmue's
fine..."
"Who?" Asked Evan.
"My turtles," I replied, a little confused, "I just told you about
them."
"Yeah," said Andrew, "but you called them Jak, Kairi, and, um, what was
the third one?
"King of All Cosmos," Evan added.
"King of... what?" I asked.
"You're disoriented." Andrew pulled my hand and as I stepped out of
the pond, he put his other hand on my back. "Go inside, get dry, and
lie down. I'm going to serve what's cooked, and get everyone out of
here," he said low enough so only I could hear.
I would have argued, but as I moved, I noticed something new bothering
me. By the weight on my chest, I could tell that I wasn't wearing a
bra. No! That wasn't the problem. I wasn't supposed to be wearing a
bra! The problem was the breasts! As I walked through the back door,
I shook myself. 'You're a man!' I thought to myself. 'Get control,
and figure this out!'
I made my way upstairs to my bedroom, and started taking off my wet
clothes as I walked over to the connected bathroom. I had dripped all
over the house, but I honestly couldn't care less right then. I had
just been molested by my own dog, in the wrong gender, and in front of
everyone I work with. I couldn't even begin to wrap my mind around
this.
I didn't bother even looking at the mirror. I knew I wouldn't like
what I found. I tossed my clothes into the basket, and grabbed my
towel. Instinctively, I started to wrap it around my chest, but I
stopped myself, and wrapped it around my waist like I always do, even
though it felt a little weird to have my tits exposed like that. I
grabbed another towel from the closet and started drying myself off as
I walked back into the bedroom. I opened the window a bit, to get some
air circulating, and then went over to my dresser to get some dry
clothes-- some dry, male clothes.
I opened the top drawer and pulled out a pair of boxers. As I pulled
them up my legs, I could hear Evan selling off the last of the burgers
through the window.
"We've got five more burgers left, I know someone's still hungry!
Michel, Autre burger, garcon?"
"Oui."
And as I pulled the elastic to my waist, I felt the snug crotch of a
pair of panties hug my new sex. I looked back down at myself in shock,
and sure enough, I was wearing a simple pair of cotton panties. I
looked back into the dresser, and saw that folded neatly right there in
front of me was a drawerful of panties. Just plain, full-cut cotton
fare, nothing too fancy. I wasn't really a very flashy girl. No! I'm
not a girl at all! Where did that come from? I shook my head, and
felt long, wet, curly locks slap me in the face. I quickly checked my
other drawers, but found out that every single item of my clothing had
been changed into something Carol would wear. I grabbed a plain T-
shirt and threw it on. All the shirts were in a women's' cut, so it
felt a bit tight in all the wrong places, but I had to wear something.
As I opened the bottom drawer and pulled out a pair of sweats,
something caught my ear from outside.
"Andrew, where's our host? We wanted to thank Elizabeth for providing
her house."
I didn't listen to Andrew's response... 'our host?' 'Elizabeth?' I
must still be out of it. I looked back down at the drawer and I
noticed something else. It was hot pink, and it was rubbery, and as I
bent down to pick it up, I found the words, "Oh, my dildo," escaping my
lips. Wait, did I just call it "my" dildo? Why would I... but, oh,
looking at it made me think about the special treatment Bowser had
given me. Even though it was embarrassing, and weird, and otherwise
horrible... I had to admit, it did feel amazing.
I dropped the sweatpants on the floor and picked up the dildo, then I
sat down on the edge of my bed, only in a T-shirt and a pair of
panties. Trying to remember what Bowser had done, I rubbed the dildo
against the front of my panties, and it was okay, but it didn't feel as
good as Bowser. I couldn't believe I was pining for my dog like this.
It was disgusting. I heard Evan shouting from outside.
"Andrew, my man. We. Are. Done! Let's clean up and go make sure
Ellie's OK."
"No," Andrew said, "I think she just needs to rest."
'Good looking out, Andrew,' I thought to myself, then I gasped in
shock, as the dildo started bending back and forth in my hand. it was
like it had a mind of its own! I let go, and it crawled down between
my legs, the head rubbing the bottom of my ass, and the tail stroking
the front of my crotch. I clenched my legs together, trapping it, but
it kept wiggling, rekindling everything that the turtle pond had
extinguished. This time, there was no shame. I was alone in my room,
the door was closed, and nobody was going to see me. But I felt even
more violated. With Bowser, at least I knew he wasn't being malicious.
He was just being Bowser. But the dildo felt like it was on a mission.
I tried to grab the tail end and pull the dildo back out. I stopped it
from rubbing my front, if nothing else, but it started squirming
double-time, and no matter how hard a grip I got on the thing, I
couldn't make it budge. Somewhere in the back of my mind, the image of
the position I was in gave me the idea of a sports league, "X-Treem
Chicken Choking," but most of me was too preoccupied with competing
between arousal and frustration.
I could feel the dildo expand a little between my hands, and then I
could feel the expansion move down its length, between my thighs, and
as it reached the head, another wave began at my hands. And then I
felt something wet against my ass.
I shot up and let go of the dildo, my hands immediately at my ass. The
thing was coming on me! The dildo had just used me to jack itself off!
I unsqueezed my legs, expecting it to just drop on the floor, but
instead it made its way into the leg of my panties. It quickly made
its way up my ass-cheek, then turned around, following the crack of my
ass down until it was straddling me from the bottom again, but this
time it was inside my panties, and the head was facing my pussy.
It sat still for a few seconds, poised right over the wet spot it had
just created, ready to invade me, almost like it was daring me to try
and stop it.
I bit. I pressed my hands tightly against my crotch, as tight as I
could, to stop it from getting into my hole, but the thing was like a
fluid. It slipped underneath my fingers almost immediately, and then
it was inside of me.
I stifled a scream. I don't know if it was of shock or arousal,
honestly, and I'm a little afraid of the answer. Accepting a momentary
defeat, I hobbled over to the window to close it. I had to make sure
Evan and Andrew didn't hear me. That would be bad. As I closed the
window, I could hear Evan down below,
"This thing needs to be planned better next time. I don't care what
she says, we are going to be just as much a part of the preparation as
she is."
The window slammed, and I dropped myself to the floor, submitting
myself to the dildo's ministrations for a moment, but then a thought
started creeping into my head. It was actually kind of fun competing
with the dildo. Fighting it, knowing I'd lose in the end. A little
smile crept across my face, as the disturbed feelings left me, and I
forgot about the horror that I'd felt just five minutes before.
My hands slunk down my waist, to the undulating bulge in my panties,
and as my hips squirmed, and my pantied ass rubbed the carpet, in my
head I was keeping time with the upstrokes, waiting for just the
right...
My right hand jerked forward and got a hold of something solid. I
pulled up, lifting the leg bands along with the wiggling dildo, and my
left hand shot underneath and grabbed the thing directly. To my
surprise, I could feel my hand through the dildo. Looking down past my
boobs, underneath the raised waistband of my panties, it almost looked,
and felt, like I had my dick back. My dick, which was currently
violating me, despite my stranglehold on it.
I pulled it out. It fought me the whole way, wiggling against my inner
walls, giving me shivers, but I was determined to put up a good effort.
I could feel the head just beyond my outer walls. Just a little more,
and-- no, I could feel it tensing from both sides this time. I was so
close, but the dildo came again. I could feel the orgasm this time.
It was separate. Like, I was still building up as a woman, but next to
that, I had just climaxed as a man. And My God, was that a climax.
My hands released, snapping my panties back down on top of the dildo.
Then the dildo started moving again. It crawled its way up my
waistband, under my T-shirt, across my belly, and rested right in my
cleavage. I could see its head through the neckhole, still dribbling
cum, teasing me. I grabbed for it with my right hand, and brushed
against my right nipple as it squirmed up and around my left boob. I
shuddered a little at the feeling in my nipple, and attacked it again,
crossing my left nipple as I missed. I shuddered again as it kept
moving, and I kept grabbing. I stood up, trying to get some better
leverage, but it didn't help. All I ended up doing was giving myself a
boob massage, and turning myself on even more. Wait, that dirty little
sneak was just making me play with myself! I was putting on a little
show for the dildo! The thing was outsmarting me every step of the
way! Well, I'd show it a thing or two.
I stopped playing my demented version of Whack-A-Mole and went back
over to the bathroom. I slipped off my panties, and pulled off my
shirt, and looked into the mirror to see a rather well-developed woman
starting me back, with a dildo nestled in her cleavage. But I wasn't
going to worry about that. I turned the water on in the shower, and
waited for it to get hot. I wasn't just going to let that dildo have
all the fun. It was going to have to do some work, too.
As I waited, the dildo started moving back and forth in my cleavage.
'That's better,' I thought. I stepped into the shower, and as the
water hit me, my whole body went tingly. This was amazing! My hands
unconsciously reached up for my chest and started giving me a real boob
massage, as I felt the dildo move upwards again. I let out a gasp, and
then coughed a little, as I found my mouth suddenly full. It had done
it again! Suddenly, I was this rubber dick's sex toy for the fourth
time in a row! This wasn't fair, the dildo was supposed to be the sex
toy, not me.
But I felt so good, I just kept moaning as the dildo made its way
further into my mouth. It crawled all the way in, and most of it was
down my throat, when I closed my lips back over it and started teasing
it with my mouth.
Finally, this was getting somewhere. I wouldn't admit it, but the
dildo's movement was teasing my mouth just as much as I was teasing it,
and combined with my own ministrations to my chest and the feel of the
water pounding my whole body, well, it was the closest I'd ever come to
an orgasm when none of my attention was focused at my crotch.
And very quickly, it became my first orgasm when none of my attention
was focused at my crotch. It was intense. I fell to my knees and rode
the feeling until I felt another orgasm, this time in my mouth, as the
dildo dropped another load inside of me. I opened my mouth, and the
dildo slipped out, coated in a mixture of saliva and cum.
Still in the after-glow, I stood back up and went through the motions
of cleaning myself off, getting rid of everything that had happened
today. Wait, what was I getting rid of? Then it all rushed back. I
was a man. I was Elliot. I'd just been a regular guy until the whole
thing with Bower. I needed to get to the backyard and look around.
Maybe I'd find something.
I turned off the water, leaving the limp dildo sitting by the drain,
and walked back into the bedroom, determined now. I didn't even bother
drying off. I picked up the sweatpants that were still on the floor
and tossed them onto the bed, far away from the cum stain the dildo had
left. I turned to the dresser and was about to grab a new pair of
panties when I heard the back door open from downstairs. I opened my
door a crack to listen.
"Hey, until Ellie wakes up, let's play with her Wii."
"Fine, I got first player."
I shut the door again, and giggled. I think I'd done enough playing
with my "Wii" today for the three of us. I went back to the dresser
and pulled out a lacy red thong. Nothing too fancy. It was just for
around the house, anyway. I stepped into them and turned back to the
bed, where I picked up the super-low rider capris that I'd tossed over
there.
Before I sqeezed into the pants, I pulled up the thong as high as it
would go, just to make sure I had a decent whale tail, then turned back
to look for a top.
Well, I guessed I'd better put a bra on. I hadn't worn one all day. I
had to wear something that matched the thong, so I was limited to just
the five red ones. Oh, it didn't matter, they were all sexy anyway. I
grabbed the halter, and picked out a tank top, slipped on a pair of
sandals and walked out my door.
My dog, Peach, was waiting right outside. No, no. My dog, Bowser.
But no, I wouldn't name my dog after that ugly turtle, would I? I
named him Peach even though he's male because I liked the character so
much. That doesn't make sense, though. I decided to test it out.
"Peach, go downstairs," I whispered. He didn't do anything. "Bowser,
go downstairs," I tried. He ran away barking. Something was wrong
with my mind. I was going to go to the backyard for some reason, but I
couldn't remember. Maybe it would hit me when I got there.
I didn't want to talk to Evan or Andrew. I wasn't sure what I'd say to
them. I mean, usually I can talk to Andrew about anything, he's so
sweet, but this was weird. So instead, I crept over to my parents' old
room and stepped out onto their balcony, and walked down to the
backyard. Those two had left the backdoor wide open... that would make
my job harder. Especially because I didn't know precisely what my job
was.
I got as close to the grill as I could while staying out of the line of
sight of the door, and looked around. I remembered that something had
happened here. Maybe if I looked around enough, something would hit
me.
I heard a splash from the turtle pond, and made my way down the steps.
Everything seemed normal over there, until the koi jumped out of the
water and beached itself. That wasn't good. Lucky I was there.
"Aren't we adventurous today," I said as I picked him up and dropped
him back in the pond.
"Than you," it said. Wait, what?
"Did you just--"
"Yes, I'm a magic koi," it responded.
"How did--"
"When I hear the magic word, I can grant a single, limited wish. You
said the magic word, so I granted your wish for me to explain it." The
fish sounded a little annoyed, but maybe that's just how fish should
sound. How was I supposed to know?
"But I didn't--"
"It doesn't have to be a spoken wish. I could sense you wanted to know
what was going on, and the best way was for me to tell you." I got the
sense that he didn't really like me.
"What's the magic--"
"I can't tell you or I lose my powers, but I can give you a hint. Your
two friends inside are playing with one."
"You mean, if I tell you I want the backyard to be clean, and say
'Wii,' it'll be--" Something changed in the corner of my eye. I looked
up, and all of the paper plates, tin foil, garbage bags, everything was
gone. The whole backyard was clear.
"That answer your question, Princess?" the koi asked.
A few pieces began to fit back into the puzzle. I suddenly knew I
hadn't been so sexed up this morning. I knew what I wanted now, "Okay,
I wish my personality, my clothes and everything were more toned-down."
"You forgot the magic word," he chided me.
"Oh yeah. Wii." And then I knew my wish was granted. I hopped up,
smoothed out my miniskirt, adjusted my tube top over my otherwise-bare
double-D's, and walked up the steps, thinking of how to get rid of Evan
so that I could have Andrew all to myself. At the top of the steps, I
turned around. "Thank you, fish. I'll be back. We have a lot to talk
about. But right now, I just want to go inside and see if I can
convince my Andrew to do a threesome with Evan."
I closed the back door behind me, the happiest girl in the world, just
imagining all the fun positions the three of us would be trying out all
afternoon.